Ghost Ship – Phelous
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Ghost Ship – Phelous

December 14, 2019


♪ [hard rock music] ♪ Phelous: What if there was a movie about a ghost ship? IT’D BE CALLED “GHOST SHIP”!!! (falsetto): Let’s take a look at it! ♪ [romantic film music (???)] ♪ Ghost Ship! Awwww! ♥ This lovely tale starts with twits dancing around on a boat. Except this girl. She’s bored. Oh, no! So this guy dances the night away with her. [creaking] [TWANG!] [BOING!] [crash] [POINK!] [POINK-POINK-POINK-POINK-POINK!] [POINK-POINK-POINK!] [POINK!] [BOING!] Except the night got CUT a little SHORT!!!!! HA HA HA HA HA!!!!!!! Yeah, this is the best part of the whole movie. (as British gentleman): Wait a second, I do believe I’ve been chopped in half. ♪ [jaunty dixieland music] ♪ (as someone who was half the woman she used to be): Come here, this is fixable… ♪ [dixieland music continues] ♪ (normal): And why was this the only guy hit so high up? He’s in the middle of the dance floor, but it seems like EVERYONE ELSE got hit in the midsection. ♪ [more dixieland music] ♪ [screams] So I guess it did that so it wouldn’t hit the little girl, ‘cuz she’s important! [imitates whooshing wire] [imitates squeaking] [concludes whoosh] Anyway, after that, we get introduced to the main heroes forty years later. Captain Murphy: Well, here’s to the best damn salvage crew in the business! Jack Ferriman (played by Desmond Harrington from Dexter): Hi, Mr. Murphy? I came across this. Maureen Epps: Congratulations. You found a boat! In the middle of the ocean! Of all places… Phelous: AHAHAHA! Let’s be idiots before hearing the whole story! Oh-ho! We’re the BEST! Detective Quinn actually explains, though, that through his investigations, he found out it’s a derelict in international waters. Munder: What do you think a ship like that could be worth? Phelous: Oh, look! It’s Dr. McCoy-Éomer! Ah? Ah? Fine, it’s Karl Urban. So they decide it’s worth going after that boat, but Quinn demands they take him, too. And they’re off! Because they’re the best! ♪ [blaring metal music] ♪ Santos: Shhhhhit! [cartoony skidding] [slide whistle] [thud] [cartoony fleeing sound effects] [BONG!] [cartoony swipe] They’re the best! Capt. Murphy: The Antonia Graza. She was reported missing on the 21st of May 1962 off the coast of Labrador. Funny thing is, there was no distress signal. No contact, she just disappeared, she was gone. Under the law of the sea, she’s ours. Phelous (nasally voiced): Yay, legal pirating! Murphy: She’s still a beaut, eh? Epps (acting poorly): Unbelievable! Phelous (as Epps): Unbelievable! It must be so… amazing! To go there! Phelous: Well, no wonder! You’ve been sitting around on this boat for 40 Years! And you thought you were bored before! Murphy: Watch your step. Forty years of rust can turn deck plates into quicksand. [creak]
Munder: AAAAHHH!!!! [clatter] Phelous: They’re the best!! [screaming] Oh, a girl. Ehhh, that’s not worth mentioning. Murphy: Are you okay? Epps: Yeah. Murphy: Sure? Phelous (as Epps): I can’t tell you, my longtime friend who I’m really close to! Ferriman: You okay? You seem quiet since you came back. Epps: I think I saw a little girl. Phelous (still as Epps): I can only tell the stranger I just met the other day! Santos: Well, you think our little tug is gonna pull this entire ocean liner? Murphy: Yeah. Phelous: Yeah? Enrico from Resident Evil: Yeah? Phelous: Yeah. Murphy: Yeah. ♪ [ominous crescendo leading to…..] ♪ […..absolutely nothing!] Phelous: [forced laughter] That was pointless. Epps: There’s a breach in the hull, about 10×20. Torn to the port collision bulkhead. Ferriman: Did it hit an iceberg or something? [salvage crew laughs] Murphy: No, you don’t need an iceberg to rupture a hull. Ferriman: I don’t know… Phelous: Ha ha ha! We mock you for your lack of knowledge on boats, you Non-Boat Guy! So they plan to fix the breach and haul it away. Santos: Murph, with the gear we got on board….. I can’t fix our little engine problem. Murphy: Why don’t you quit bitching and just overhaul the starboard engine, please? Santos: That’s the plan, alright. Murphy: Just do it. Phelous (as Santos): That’s not gonna work! (as Murphy): Just do it! (as Santos): Okay, it’ll work now. Greer: I’ll call in. Murphy: We just don’t want any unexpected guests. Just leave it. Santos: I mean, what these people talking crazy for? Why are you looking at me like that? That’s not even good English! [slapped by a ghost…. I guess…..] [stumbles back] [sniffs] Oh, still sweet, though. […your guess is as good as Phelous’s] Barry Burton from Resident Evil: WHAT?! What IS this?? Harry Mason from Silent Hill: Have you seen a little girl? Just turned seven last month. [cartoony swipe] [BONK!] Phelous (as Greer): Jeez, that’s a long drop. Sure hope I don’t fall down there later! HA HA HA HA! Like THAT will happen! (normal): Anyway, the pool sucks up the blood, and– Wow. Seriously? Was there any reason for that blood to be bad CGI? You couldn’t just shoot liquid out of a hole? Anyway, that obviously makes it a Blood Pool Sandwich! Epps: I might need your help shutting it again, so get ready. Ferriman: Are you sure we need–? [squeak] [water rushes in] Han Solo: The garbage chute was a really wonderful idea! What an incredible smell you’ve discovered! Phelous: What have I been tellin’ ya? They’re the BEST!!! Ferriman: How long do you think they’ve been here?? Epps: I don’t know! A month, maybe less! Luke Skywalker: There’s something alive in here! [rats squeaking] Ferriman: Look at this. Phelous: Sweet! Nice pyrite! Greer: “Francesca”. Nice titties. Not that though… you can hold a candle to the future Mrs. Greer, though. Phelous (as Francesca’s ghost): How DARE you?! Suck my TITS!!!!! Ferriman: ’58 Jaguar X[K]150. I’ve had dreams about this car since I was a kid! Epps: We have to get out of here now. Do you understand me? Now! Phelous: Okay, why is that car there? (increasingly dopey-voiced): Is it a Ghost Car? On a Ghost Ship? Ferriman: Don’t go in there. Phelous (as Epps): [sigh] Well now I HAVE to! [Munder and Dodge screaming like dumbasses] [Munder and Dodge laughing at their stupid prank] Epps: FUCK you!! You want to hear something funnier? We just found a bunch of dead guys floating in the laundry room! And THIS… in the cargo hold! [slam] Phelous: Well the GOLD does seem like something to laugh about… [laughing with joy] Apparently, they agree. Even SHE does, so I don’t know why it made her angry before. Guess she just hadn’t talked for a while. Murphy: We leave the boat, take the gold. Who’s with me? Santos: I’m with the gold, man. Munder: Gold. Ferriman: The boat. Phelous: Fuck the gold! I’m with the BOAT! Like any of them will say that. Shut the hell up, Ghost Ship! But a ghost turns the propane on. UH-OH! Oh, and the little girl tries to warn them, because she was obviously good this whole time. [explosion] [splash] [another explosion] Epps: Santos!! SANTOS!!!
♪ [Metal Gear Solid’s Game Over music] ♪ ♪ [Metal Gear Solid’s Game Over music] ♪ SANTOS!!!
♪ [Metal Gear Solid’s Game Over music] ♪ ♪ [Metal Gear Solid’s Game Over music] ♪ Dodge: Did you find anything out about this ship before you sent us out here? Phelous: What? He’s blaming lack of research on this boat for their ship blowing up? I assume he just wants to be an ass right now! Ferriman: Look, Santos came out here out of his own free will, just like the rest of– Dodge: What does that mean, huh?! HUH?!?! The FUCK do you mean?!?! Epps: ENOUGH! Dodge: Santos is dead because of you! Phelous (slurring like he’s drunk): Heh heh heh, I TOLD you….. Greer: Had Murphy let me do it my way from the start, we wouldn’t even be in this situation right now. And the Coast Guard everybody’s so fucking worried about– Munder: So it’s everybody’s fault but your own, right? Greer: We’ll be on our way home! Munder: Grow up, asshole. [punch] Phelous: They’re the best!! When they lose part of the team, they all pull together and try to kill each other! And the Captain decides to lead by example….. and gets drunk. Epps: Here it is: “Katie”. B-deck. Phelous: Yes. “Katie”. There’s no way that CAN’T be her! Greer: Should’ve called it in. DAMN!!!!! Phelous: If I’d called it in, the boat wouldn’t have blown up! DAMN it!! ♪ [creepy music] ♪ Munder: It’s good! Campbell’s Soup jingle: ♪ Mmm! Mmm! Good!® ♪ Phelous: Aged for Flavor! Oh, it was that Joke Food that turns Into maggots after a couple bites. That stuff is so funny! ♪ Let’s do the Time Warp again! ♪ ♪ If we really have to… ♪ (increasingly depressed): ♪ Let’s do the Time Warp again….. ♪ [applause] Pfft. It wasn’t THAT good. ♪ [slow piano and violin music] ♪ Francesca: [speaking French] Greer: I know all of this isn’t real… ♫ ♫ So, well….. I’m just gonna go with it, okay? ♫ ♫ Katie: Please.
Epps: [gasp!] Phelous: Oh, and Little Ghost Girl decides to show up and chat it up. Guess she’s tired of the “Mysterious Staring” appearances. Epps: You should have this back. Phelous: Right! The ghosts can’t interact with physical objects. Except for turning propane on… kissing….. walking on the floor… and sitting on beds! Oh, and handing books! Katie: We’re all trapped here. When the boat’s full, we’ll all be ferried. [panicking] [wet, organic creeping sounds] Epps: What’s wrong?
Katie: He doesn’t want me talking to you! Epps: “He” who? Katie: But I’m not like the others!! Phelous: So she was good all along! Some advanced warning might have been helpful instead of random staring, you stupid little twit! ♪ [more creepy music] ♪ ♪ [rising crescendo] ♪ Greer: NOOOOO!!! [cartoony swipe] AAAAAHHHHH!!! [BONK!] Francesca: [speaking French] Phelous: That whole thing was a set-up to make him fall down there. That spot where he’d looked down would’ve been easy to push him down before. Oh, except that she can’t touch him… except that she can. Murphy gets tricked into seeing Epps as the dead Santos and tries to kill her, and gets thrown into the drunk tank. Literally! Munder: What’s with the heart? Epps: Belonged to this little girl.
Munder: What girl? Epps: She told me to get off this boat. We stick with the plan. Fix the boat. Phelous: Seriously, you think I’m gonna listen to some stupid ghost? The hell do they know? They’re already dead! Munder: Son of a bitch! We may just get out of this yet. Epps: I’m gonna see if I can find Greer down below. Phelous: Oh yeah, him. (as Katie): I’m back to doing the staring again! (normal): Oh! You didn’t survive that fall. How surprising. Munder: Shit!
Dodge: Number two’s clogged! Who’s goin’? Munder: You’ll go! Karl Urban as Dr. McCoy: Dammit man, I’m a doctor, not a physicist! Phelous: So Katie decides to show Epps the whole story NOW, ‘cuz doing it earlier would’ve spoiled the whole movie. ♪ [unfitting, yet funky, hip-hop beat] ♪ Phelous: [wheezing laugh] “Oooh, I hate to see myself scream!” Could they make this any sillier? They’ve already scored this so silly, I don’t think there’s any way I could do it worse! …Or IS there?? No, there isn’t. ♪ [The Lonely Island’s “I’m on a Boat” sped up to avoid YouTube’s overzealous copyright bots] ♪ So yeah, everyone apparently kept killing each other. (dramatic voice): For the gold! ♪ [return of the unfitting hip-hop beat] ♪ Well, that was a pretty elaborate set-up. As was the line cutting people above! Which I don’t know how Singer Girl avoided, since she was apparently singing up to the point it happened! Anyway, the last guy has a different motive than gold: Giving her the mark! Dahlia from Silent Hill: The mark of Samael! Phelous: And it was Detective Quinn all along! Epps (breathlessly): Murphy! Phelous: Oh, come on, like she really told you in time to save a single one of them. He’s dead. Just like that. Amazing. Epps: But I want you and Dodge to stay on the rudder here. Dodge: Wait, but you just said– Epps: Dodge, listen to me. I do not want you two out of each other’s sight. Take this. Phelous: Yes, I’m sure Dodge babysitting Dr. Evil will turn out great! Feriman: I’m gonna go check on Epps. Dodge: No, you’re not. She said to wait here. Ferriman: You’re a pathetic excuse for a man. Resident Evil intro song: I got a shotgun! [shotgun blasts]
[girl screams] ♪ [“You can’t kill a ghost!” chord] ♪ Phelous: Shotguns don’t seem to be working very well lately. Epps: Trip’s over. I’m sinking the boat. Dodge: What about the gold? Epps: We’re not getting the gold off this boat; nobody ever does! Dodge: Alright… ALRIGHT!! [splash] Fuckin’ BITCH!!! [high-pitched metallic clanking] Alright, you win! Go ahead, do it! Go ahead!! Blow it up!!! [explosion] Phelous: Okay, sorry, that doesn’t happen. …’til a few more minutes. Of course, Dodge reveals that he’s really Megatron! [Transformers’ transforming sounds] Ferriman: Dodge made the same mistake. He’s dead! Phelous (in mock shock): Ohh, I’m SO surprised!! Epps: What the fuck are you? Ferriman: I’m a salvager, just like you. You collect ships… I collect souls. Shang Tsung from Mortal Kombat: Your soul is mine! [Oh, I get it! Ferriman’s a FERRY-Man!] Phelous: [breaks down laughing] MANAGEMENT!!! [laughing wildly] Management!!! [insane laughter] Management! Ha ha… I guess I forgot how lucrative the SOUL Business was! [giggling madly] Ferriman the Ferryman: See, it’s a job. Phelous (as Ferriman): I looked through the ads for other jobs, but this was the only one I was qualified for. And it still took me 40 years to get it done. Ferriman: What’re ya gonna do, SHOOT me?! [explosion for reals this time] [screaming] Phelous: And all the souls are free, and of course, the exploding ship was no match for Epps! She swims away and gets picked up and taken into an ambulance, and everything is just fine. Yes, ‘cuz when these things keep running after the climax, NOTHING BAD happens, right? Yes, of course she sees Quinn apparently getting ready to kill everyone on a new boat. (unimpressed): Oh, no. Oh, no, she’ll only have 40+ years to stop them! Pfft! Ghost Ship Is just an extremely underwhelming ride to Weak-Ass-Plot-Ville. And while this movie didn’t shy away from any gore, it’s kind of weird that almost every death of a main character happens off-screen! Making them all very anticlimactic. You really get the feeling something more was meant to be going on here, but of course, nothing ever does. This makes a lot of sense when you find out the movie was originally intended to be more of a psychological thriller, but they pulled the old bait-and-switch, and apparently disappointed the whole cast when they found out the crap they’d ACTUALLY be starring in! There was a plot here. It’s gone now! Instead, all we were left with is Soul Businessman! Which reminds me: why did he see that car? What was the point in that? “I’m behind this whole thing! Hey, look at this car I like!” Goodbye, Ghost Ship. May you sail off to the Shit Sea from whence you came. Pffh. Now you’re probably thinking all that’s left is for me to die. Well nope, not this time, and no, I’m not even gonna do that “Oh, I’m ending the show” and THEN die! Know why? (sinisterly): Because I’m already dead! [evil laughter] I’ve been marked! And by watching this silly review, I will now FeardotCom.com your soul… to the D1!! [evil laughter] This is Phelous D1 signing out! Sad Panda: ♪ I don’t like this movie ♪ ♪ It doesn’t look too friendly ♪ ♪ These monsters seem so fake ♪ ♪ My nerves are gonna break ♪ ♪ Phelous, don’t let me down ♪ ♪ You need to be a-round ♪ ♪ Grab that running 1-up ♪ ♪ and blast that thing a new one ♪ ♫ ♫ ♪ This movie… ♪ ♪ looks shitty ♪ ♫ ♫ ♪ Phelous, oh Phelous ♪ ♪ Bring on Mortal Komedy ♪ ♪ Oh Phelous, oh Phelous ♪ ♪ And some more horror movies ♪ ♪ Oh Phelous, oh Phelous ♪ ♪ I don’t care ’bout how you sound ♪ ♪ Oh Phelous, oh Phelous ♪ ♪ What’s your opinion about? ♪♪ Phelous D1: Because I’m already dead! [not-quite-evil laughter] [takes breath] [maniacal laughter] (laughing): I forget the line! [maniacal laughter]

100 Comments

  • Reply RagingRivoth Cooper October 8, 2017 at 8:45 pm

    I don't what is worst about this film the movies title or the fact Satan is in this…thats right folks…Satan in a film about ghosts on a ship called "Ghost Ship"

  • Reply RagingRivoth Cooper October 8, 2017 at 8:48 pm

    also poor Karl Urban being put into this terrible film.

  • Reply spindalis79 October 10, 2017 at 3:24 am

    This wasn't that bad. I actually sort of enjoyed this movie. The stage props really made it look like they were on a ship that had been rotting in the ocean for 40 years.

  • Reply Exquisite Existential Exception October 11, 2017 at 5:43 am

    I love the Looney tunes sound fx they make this better.

  • Reply The CreepyPasta Reader October 14, 2017 at 6:18 pm

    Not to point out the obvious. But, your ending credits has a GLARING problem. Mortal Kombat the movie, came out in 1995…

  • Reply CountessChuchoteur October 15, 2017 at 9:16 am

    You know, in a lot of ways, Ghost Ship is very similar to Event Horizon.

  • Reply Kashi K. October 15, 2017 at 9:42 pm

    i think the Antonia Graza (the ship in the movie) is based off of the Andrea Doria (the ship that sunk after the SS Stockholm collision)

  • Reply FanfareT.Loudest October 16, 2017 at 7:29 pm

    After I first saw this movie, I remember wondering if the opening scene was directed by someone else. It was perfect and so well-executed (excuse the pun)! Everything after that part is either weak or laughable in terms of being a scary story.

  • Reply ToxicityHazard-Lvl1 October 20, 2017 at 7:10 pm

    Someone call Mythbusters to prove that"wire can cut as many people on board" theory.

  • Reply Robo Lizard Studio October 22, 2017 at 12:07 pm

    I have a few questions. First off, is your name really Phelous? Second, how often do people call you phallus? And third, if you answered yes to question#1, have you ever considered changing your name to something less mockable? Love the vids, keep it up 🙂

  • Reply William Hiers October 30, 2017 at 12:12 am

    The car is probably there because it was being transported aboard the boat. There was a Renault aboard the Titanic.

  • Reply Marcus Zyker November 17, 2017 at 1:51 am

    So Satan and judge Dread board a haunted ship

  • Reply Marcus Zyker November 17, 2017 at 1:52 am

    Still better than ghost rig. Still have bad memories of that eco terrorist ghost movie

  • Reply anik monette December 2, 2017 at 5:54 pm

    You should review Below, it's a horror movie where the story happens in a submarine… It must have sucked because I can't remember anything that happens! ?

  • Reply ILONA Finnish December 7, 2017 at 5:24 pm

    Since every passenger had dragon sickness, I was waiting Thorin Oakenshield being a ghost, too.

  • Reply Brandon Borak December 28, 2017 at 6:19 pm

    Hey 1

  • Reply masteranimearcher January 9, 2018 at 8:21 pm

    Early horror game voice acting has never been more fitting

  • Reply YukiSkyZero January 16, 2018 at 10:57 am

    Wow….
    They really "sliced" it up on the beginning tho…xD

    yeah, I can't think of something for the lulz. xD

    Anyway, another review that I love. 🙂

  • Reply Ben Quinney January 21, 2018 at 4:39 am

    At least they are wearing underwear

  • Reply Haiden C. January 25, 2018 at 2:59 am

    Um at 11:39 he asks how the singer ladie survived that well to answer your question she was in the ballroom the slicing happen on the bow.

  • Reply Not'The ChosenJuan February 5, 2018 at 12:37 am

    Time Warp reference are always welcome

  • Reply Justin Lynch February 6, 2018 at 7:25 pm

    I actually really like this movie.

  • Reply Boogie Thug Rose February 8, 2018 at 12:57 am

    TRIANGLE TRIANGLE TRIANGLE TRIANGLE TRIANGLE TRIANGLE TRIANGLE TRIANGLE TRIANGLE TRIANGLE TRIANGLE TRIANGLE TRIANGLE TRIANGLE TRIANGLE TRIANGLE TRIANGLE TRIANGLE TRIANGLE TRIANGLE TRIANGLE TRIANGLE TRIANGLE TRIANGLE TRIANGLE TRIANGLE TRIANGLE TRIANGLE

  • Reply bloodrunsclear February 11, 2018 at 4:44 am

    The sped up Lonely Island works even better!

  • Reply Lavern Merriweather February 12, 2018 at 1:58 am

    The singing girl was in the BALLROOM performing not on the bow with the dancers, they heard her on the loud speakers.

  • Reply TB7 Productions February 14, 2018 at 1:37 am

    I like the concept of this film. But the way it was distributed was very poor.

  • Reply Juan D'Marco February 15, 2018 at 5:57 am

    They're the best!

  • Reply Maverick 117 February 17, 2018 at 8:30 am

    Phelous was ahead of his time

  • Reply Black Narcissus February 23, 2018 at 6:06 am

    I forgot about this movie. Although, I do remember watching this piece of dogshit at my friend's birthday party when it first came out, I was like 11. It's just so bland and forgettable, the rest of the kids seemed to enjoy it, I was pretty much asleep with my eyes open the entire time. Anyways, good video. I know it's like 8 years old, lol. But still good review. I would've liked to see the film that it was supposed to be, that sounds like it could've been good. That's a shame.

  • Reply Toi O'Kelly March 3, 2018 at 2:12 am

    Yeah.?

  • Reply Nico March 14, 2018 at 8:06 pm

    Say what you will about this movie. But that opening scene is great lol

  • Reply Nate Smith March 17, 2018 at 8:17 pm

    at least the red queens in this

  • Reply Nee Bee March 22, 2018 at 7:50 am

    Ghost event ship horizon.

  • Reply Nell Ross March 24, 2018 at 1:52 pm

    The closed captions on this video are perfect, "unfitting, yet funky, hip-hop beat'. Lol.
    The opening scene really is the best part of this film. Well, that, and Phelous reviewing it.

  • Reply Leia Elkins March 29, 2018 at 1:49 am

    It cut the captain in the head because he leaned down to protect Katie, and she didn't get cut because she was shorter than everyone else. She did end up being hanged in her cabin though. One of my favorite horror suspense movies.

  • Reply Jeremy Ray April 13, 2018 at 11:40 pm

    Ghost girl kinda looks like a young Emily “Baby Doll” Browning.Rather an Unfortunate Event what happened to her on this Ghost Ship and then gets stuck in love with Jon Snow in Pompeii and then gets reanimated from death in American Gods. I’m sure she was in more stuff. Anyways Emily Browning.

  • Reply AndrewNiccals April 18, 2018 at 8:14 am

    I don't care how many times people's gonna shit over this movie, I love it with a passion.

  • Reply Chad Castagana April 20, 2018 at 5:38 pm

    At the beginning of the movie there were too many extras, so they split the difference, but most came up short 🙂

  • Reply just an average nerd May 2, 2018 at 8:56 pm

    Yeeeeeeeah this movie was bad…..

  • Reply ai i May 11, 2018 at 4:49 am

    lol that metal gear skit was priceless. ? Well done. Awesome review, Phelous ✨✨?

  • Reply princesssookeh May 13, 2018 at 7:53 am

    The Dexter joke killed me!

  • Reply God is a Critter May 29, 2018 at 12:19 pm

    This movie fucking traumatized me ? idk what my parents were thinking

  • Reply Jonathan Warrdddedcxddeececldron June 28, 2018 at 1:03 am

    It wasn’t a ghost that turned the propane on, it was just hank hill

  • Reply Jonathan Warrdddedcxddeececldron June 28, 2018 at 1:11 am

    Also that awesome flashback music while silly is great

  • Reply Jonathan Warrdddedcxddeececldron June 28, 2018 at 1:13 am

    Gotta catch em all, souls!

  • Reply Minako Hiashi July 4, 2018 at 6:48 am

    I have the VHS. I don't have a VCR Anymore. Whatever reason this is not on Netflix or Hulu so I still never watched it

  • Reply Larnciel darknciel July 20, 2018 at 4:57 am

    come on, the scene of the car was necessary. She was going to tell everybody to get out of the boat after she saw the dead bodies in the laundry room. He talks about the car, but his real objective was to show her the gold. How is that scene pointless. People fucks up no matter how much of an expert they are. 911 for example could have been stopped but the experts thought it was a drill and they didn't do nothing about it. or so we are told. People can be wrong. RE 7 sucks, but most people think it is a good game. I said it is shit, and I will never buy it. I don't even care to see the walkthough. The story is so idiotic that its not worth my time. I rather play RE 1 2 or 3.

  • Reply Zcumbag July 22, 2018 at 12:23 am

    Even if the captain crouched to protect her, how was he able to stand up with his brain separated from his spine? Hell why not just hit the deck and keep himself alive too?

  • Reply DarkOniFlames July 28, 2018 at 9:28 am

    Nice titties

  • Reply MJ - FERMEZ LA August 12, 2018 at 1:07 pm

    For the subtitles guy. The singer dosen't speck french, but Italian… also, the second part where she talk, it's actually a clip from Dexter "Sorry for the tits"

  • Reply Geeky GamerGirl September 3, 2018 at 9:15 pm

    Well, I put off Phelous tearing up the movie that made me go "Wow! I'm not scared of horror movies anywhere!" long enough. The one that took the turn where I'm now fascinated by them. Really, minus the twist, still love it. It got the job done better than most horror at the time.

  • Reply Hawk Kalitz September 17, 2018 at 8:16 am

    The best part that isn't about the movie in this video…is watching Phelan dance for about 8 seconds. Beautiful…So You Think You Can Dance ain't got nothing on this guy.

  • Reply MrXemrox October 12, 2018 at 8:14 pm

    5:00 They should be bones, not weeks or months old under water.

  • Reply MrXemrox October 12, 2018 at 8:20 pm

    7:59–8:13 What would make a good parody if that scene.

    One of them just shrugs and continues eating.

  • Reply The FBI October 13, 2018 at 2:29 am

    The director of this film only has one other credit and that's the 2001 remake of Thirteen Ghosts, which is ….

    … well let's just say that it's a lot more entertaining than Ghost Ship and the characters are infinitely more likable, even if it's not as polished as Ghost Ship.

  • Reply Hlootoo Thunderhammer October 13, 2018 at 4:34 pm

    Shame, a haunted ship would've been an interesting location instead of the cliche: mansion, hospital, hotel, insane asylum, orphanage, ancient Indian burial ground, etc etc.

  • Reply ScreamingScallop November 5, 2018 at 5:13 am

    The instant you know the name of the shlub who hired the salvage crew you'll know the Shocking Plot Twist.

  • Reply Obywatel Cane November 11, 2018 at 10:32 am

    Everybody got cut by the inbred wire 😉

  • Reply Monroe Riddell November 16, 2018 at 8:43 am

    10:44 This is one of the many reasons why I love Phelous.

  • Reply Tobar TheFerryman November 27, 2018 at 4:29 pm

    MMkay that title card will be haunting my dreams for the next week.

  • Reply Major Misfit December 9, 2018 at 5:12 pm

    I saw this movie in the theatre at a midnight showing. People in the audience kept making comments & cracking one liners. Truly it was a great time and a riot to laugh at with others.

  • Reply alieninvaider January 13, 2019 at 6:15 am

    I loved this movie as a kid but now that I’m older its really stupid.

  • Reply Tito February 2, 2019 at 6:36 pm

    Ah, it’s the Series of Unfortunate Events girl. She’s pretty bland.

  • Reply Dorian Green February 4, 2019 at 4:21 am

    So if Michael Myers was on this ship and the bad guy tried to give him the mark could Mikey show his wrist with the mark of Thorn and be all "Nah, I'm good bro."?

  • Reply Adrian Espinel March 8, 2019 at 2:35 pm

    Legal pirating? That's like my two favorite words in the English language.

  • Reply In_Vas_Por March 11, 2019 at 4:06 am

    The shotgun joke never gets old lmfao….

  • Reply luckyluke 1983 March 16, 2019 at 10:19 pm

    I it takes 4-6 tugs to pull the ship and you can't over haul any engine within a few hours.

  • Reply luckyluke 1983 March 16, 2019 at 10:21 pm

    Hey up you give an idea ghost car.

  • Reply Kaldaryn March 23, 2019 at 8:28 am

    This movie is a fun ride. :U

  • Reply William Tunstell Back up account March 29, 2019 at 7:19 am

    Lol 6:51

  • Reply LOSER April 4, 2019 at 11:05 am

    3:46 Karl Urban??? Why are you in Ghost Ship??? Love the hair tho

  • Reply DevilGearHill April 6, 2019 at 5:06 pm

    Love when you don't care about characters in a horror movie. Always a justification for having them all die and what can be better ?

  • Reply FanfareT.Loudest April 10, 2019 at 6:54 am

    Ah Ghost Ship. The movie I think is so bad the movie scene in the beginning belongs in another movie that deserves a sequence so well-executed.

  • Reply undeadgentlemen[_}; April 12, 2019 at 2:35 am

    Ewww, aged baked beans. beans turn into a can of maggots. Quick get the oil and skillet! We're making grub poppers and any left over we'll use for fish bait… They are both match for protein, but one doesn't give you gas.

  • Reply Aksa khan April 18, 2019 at 3:06 pm

    I want to watch this movie but I don't know where I can fine it.

  • Reply TheDeadCobra April 19, 2019 at 3:49 pm

    There clearly would be more people working on the ship then just the once who danced so why did none of the workers returned the ship back did they all just ran on dingi and left the girl alone?
    Why are all the ghosts killing people a Ghost does not means they are evil

  • Reply M&M_RatPack April 27, 2019 at 5:22 pm

    What is that soul collector? Was he a demon or the devil?!?

  • Reply Some Clever Name June 4, 2019 at 2:51 am

    I remember seeing the DVD cover as a kid at blockbuster thinking this movie looked really scary. Guess I was wrong.

  • Reply Erika June 12, 2019 at 12:53 am

    Hold me up! Don't let me go! 🙂

  • Reply ULGROTHA July 2, 2019 at 4:45 am

    I completely forgot about this one until the playlist turned it up. I can remember countless of Phelous's reviews off the drop of a hat, but I utterly forgot this one. This film is that lame.

  • Reply rrpostalagain July 16, 2019 at 10:14 am

    This just made me want to watch ER.

  • Reply I have a Titanic profile picture July 24, 2019 at 8:22 pm

    "What did I tell ya?"
    "THEY'RE THE BEST!"

  • Reply princesssookeh August 12, 2019 at 5:45 am

    9:41 NOT LILA! XD XD XD

  • Reply TheGlubnar isthewat August 14, 2019 at 4:37 am

    You can make the flashback scene where its shown how people die on the boat sillyer by adding SpongeBob music

  • Reply Cj Kalandek August 27, 2019 at 10:52 pm

    This movie feels like a hodgepodge of The Shining and Event Horizon. And I still think Event Horizon came out with more dignity.

  • Reply Alex Monte August 28, 2019 at 12:41 am

    This movie had the gall to use "Dig" by Mudvayne?

  • Reply Bobby's Bundle August 29, 2019 at 12:22 pm

    YEAH!

  • Reply Tevya Smolka September 1, 2019 at 4:46 am

    I agree the beginning of the movie is actually really good

  • Reply Lizafoot For5 September 4, 2019 at 1:27 pm

    Lamer version of Man of Medan. Prologue: still cool ??

  • Reply Matthew Walton September 19, 2019 at 6:58 pm

    That scene at the beginning reminded me of the Final Destination movies.

  • Reply Nemesis Stars September 23, 2019 at 1:01 am

    The dark pictures man of Medan was based from this film and they are both similar about the paranormal

  • Reply Samsara September 26, 2019 at 12:48 am

    The best thing by far in this movie is the mudvayne song.

  • Reply NIGHTMARE 999 4 October 5, 2019 at 2:25 am

    Munder's name is close to murder maybe he's the ghost ship

  • Reply Spellbinder October 10, 2019 at 10:04 pm

    what happened to Karl Urban?

  • Reply Juci Shockwave October 20, 2019 at 1:48 am

    Watching this because it's faster and shorter than than the real thing. ??

  • Reply Senshi Furiouz October 21, 2019 at 4:52 pm

    I watched that Movie many years ago. I found it quite amusing. Now, years later I think it's pretty stupid:)

  • Reply newest bear October 28, 2019 at 2:05 am

    This movie would drive any same person nuts.

  • Reply NICK BURKHEART November 30, 2019 at 2:35 pm

    I swear I’m like the one person who genuinely likes this film lol

  • Reply Rose Vee December 8, 2019 at 4:39 am

    That'd make a pretty funny (possibly adult?) cartoon tbh. A ghost accountant collects a quota of souls to make his Ghost Management happy. Lol. I mean, if you really played it up and made the ghost accountant literally look like a nerdy accountant working in an office it could be funny

  • Reply Devin Harbert December 10, 2019 at 1:49 am

    I love how dum this film is, it’s like a cheap rip off of land of the dead, it was a much better film.

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