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    FIGHT CLUB [Film Analysis with Maggie Mae Fish]
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    FIGHT CLUB [Film Analysis with Maggie Mae Fish]

    November 14, 2019


    I wanna tell you a story about a really cool
    friend I have. This person dresses really slick, always says the right thing, dates
    the hottest people. My friend can win in any fight. And guess what: that person is MEEEEEEEE. That’s basically the argument of Fight Club.
    One guy telling us about how cool someone is, then revealing that “actually” that
    guy is me. How come when we watch a movie that makes that argument, it’s compelling,
    but if someone did that to you in person, you’d think they’re a garbage person?
    Maybe if we look a little closer at Fight Club, we can figure it out. The standard reading of Fight Club is that
    Jack is schizophrenic; that he invents Tyler as an alternate personality out of either
    boredom or a sense of inferiority, and then the Tyler personality takes over Jack’s
    mind for a while, does a bunch of terrorist stuff, but eventually Jack saves the day.
    Even though society seems like it’s about to crumble, the bad man is sent away. Happy
    ending, right? But I would like to propose a different reading: that this is a story
    told by Tyler from the very beginning. “This is it. The beginning.” That the personality
    of “Jack” never existed within the fictional world. Tyler is real. Jack is just a character
    invented by Tyler to manipulate us, the audience. Talking about a fictional character within
    a fictional story can be a bit confusing, so… we need to go over some concepts first. I’ve always felt like I’m not alone when
    I watch a movie, or TV, or a YouTube video. The person on screen is talking to me, even
    though I know they’re just pixels flashing on a monitor and vibrations emanating from
    speakers. I know that they’re not really here. That all these characters and places
    are absent, but I know that these images and sounds represent people places and emotions.
    I feel–no, I don’t just feel, I KNOW that they are present. This is known as “absence/presence.” Some movies are so clever, they’ll even
    draw attention to their own absence/presence: “We have front row seats at this theater
    of mass destruction.” That “we” is Jack and Tyler, but we is also us, the audience.
    The disembodied voice-over acknowledges that we’re aware we are about to watch a show.
    Then “we” impossibly float through walls in a complicated VFX shot. All these things
    are absent, but at the same time we feel they are present. As you can find in a basic film studies textbook:
    ”The spectator knows very well that what he is watching is a fiction, but all the same
    he maintains the belief, indeed his pleasure is dependent on the belief, that it is not.
    Cinema is thus founded on a regime of spectating at once knowing one thing and believing its
    opposite, which, as we have seen, is precisely the structure of disavowal.” The process of disavowal has been described
    by the formula: ‘I know, but all the same.’ We KNOW that the movie we are watching is
    not real. BUT in order to enjoy a movie, we must *believe* on some level that it is real. By starting with “I know,” we seem to
    acknowledge something or someone’s point of view, then by adding the “but” we disavow
    what we just claimed to know as true. Not every “I know, but” statement is disavowal.
    And not every statement of disavowal requires “I know, but.” When a politician says
    “let’s not make this political,” they are disavowing the fact that everything is
    inherently political. Dishonest people love disavowal because it makes them seem rational. It’s already weird that we’re able to
    follow the average film, following characters from scene to scene, across time and space.
    In Fight Club, Tyler and Jack are a weird, extremely literal manifestation of absence/presence
    and disavowal. By the end of the movie, Tyler is popping in and out of existence even within
    a single shot, the way characters pop in and out of existence when we change from one scene
    to another in any movie. By pushing absence/presence and disavowal
    into the foreground, Fincher keeps our minds so busy, we forget exactly what it is we’re
    even disavowing. Hint: it’s terrorism. “And let me pause to say, film theory and psycho-analytic
    concepts like these are not inherently good or inherently bad. Personally, I’m glad
    I can enjoy a movie through disavowal. Even a fictional narrative can reveal deeper truths
    about the human condition. What we need to ask is: what are the effects of a particular
    film’s use of these concepts? And, are the implications of the narrative true? So, with
    that in mind… There’s one more term we need to cover.
    Fetishism in pop culture is usually understood as someone getting overly horny at the sight
    of an object, like a pair of sexy red shoes. Cultural theorist Thomas Ying-ling wrote that
    it’s more useful to think of fetishism “as it has been defined in psychoanalysis not
    as the overvaluation of some part-object but as the denial of lack.” For example, the
    American flag is a fetish object, often used to deny a lack of freedom. How can you say
    I’m not free when I’ve got this piece of dyed cloth that stands in for freedom?
    By continually filling his life with Swedish furniture, Jack fills his life with fetish
    objects that comfort him. Collecting all these objects distract from what is lacking in his
    life. Clearly he’s lacking something. “Please just give me something.” If only Jack had
    a friend who would tell him what’s lacking in his life. Just as Jack fetishizes his furniture, audiences
    participate in fetism while watching movies. Film theorist Christian Metz wrote on the
    subject in the 1970s: “Fetishism occurs on screen within the image, as in the case
    of the fetishizing of the body of the femme fatale in film noir. But, says Metz, fetishism
    operates also at a far more basic level. The image as image and the cinematic apparatus
    as apparatus are both fetish, because they stand in for, make present, what is absent.
    As such, they disavow what is lacking.” Just as Jack fetishizes furniture to deny
    the lack in his own life, we fetishize the cinematic image to deny the lack of reality
    represented by that image. I know Spiderman is a fictional character, but when I see him
    die, I feel like a real person has died. If only we had a movie to tell us what we’re
    lacking in our lives. Fight Club is a story told by an unreliable
    narrator, whose goal is to explain away his own guilt and justify the position he’s
    established as the leader of a terrorist organization; an organization he knowingly and willingly
    created because he wants the rest of the world to be as miserable as he is. The narrative is told by, and controlled by,
    Tyler. Jack isn’t Tyler’s alter ego, or imaginary friend. In Jack, Tyler has created
    the perfect candidate for Project Mayhem, confident that we will see ourselves in Jack.
    That we’ll identify with Jack’s insecurities, doubts about society, and fear of self examination.
    In a 1999 interview, Fincher spoke to Tyler’s embodiment of disavowal: “[Y]ou have to
    have a guy that’s going, ‘Well, I can see your point, but it seems to me… You
    can look at losing all of your stuff both ways. Yeah, it’s all of your stuff; yeah,
    it took you years to collect; yes, they were all tasteful, interesting choices. But there’s
    another side to it.’” Tyler anticipates our moral reservations, lays them out in very
    childish terms, then goes “but!” and gives Jack a pre-packaged, simplistic counter-argument.
    “I say, let’s evolve. Let the chips fall where they may.” Okay, whatever that means.
    Tyler needs to invent the character of Jack, to give us a friendly, gullible fetish object
    to identify with. Jack is the image we can attach ourselves to, so that we can tell ourselves
    we–just like Jack–were innocent all along. We are free to enjoy the violence, even up
    to and including terrorist acts, because in the end we see Jack’s image, standing there,
    victorious. The image of Jack remains, although he now admits that he’s Tyler. Jack’s
    image is present, but Jack is absent. Tyler’s image is absent, but Tyler is present. By
    ending on Jack’s image, we deny the lack of morality in what Tyler has done. “Everything’s
    gonna be fine.” We can deny that this kind of power fantasy is appealing, to “guys
    like us,” because the good guy–or at least the image of the good guy–is the one left
    standing in the end. Also, that’s not how schizophrenia works. Fight Club is a movie that’s clearly designed
    to be watched multiple times, but with each viewing, we disavow more and more. The first
    viewing is exciting. We the audience experience revelation after revelation along with Jack,
    up until we learn that “Tyler is Jack.” Usually when we watch a movie for a second
    time, we’re able to break down a story’s structure a little better, and recognize key
    themes more clearly. We start to see the strings. It’s why the Sixth Sense is kind of boring
    on the second viewing, because now you’re just paying attention to how M Night Shyamalan
    “pulled it off.” But that’s not the experience of watching Fight Club for a second
    time. As viewers, solving a mystery is both entertaining and comforting. We want to understand
    what really happened in this fictional universe, and Tyler lays out a pretty fun, sardonic,
    flashy answer to the mystery of ‘who is Tyler Durden?’ Once we feel like we have that
    answer–even though it’s just ‘Tyler’s version of what happened in this fictional
    narrative–we get to sit back on the second viewing and just enjoy the ride. However,
    repeat viewings do not give us a deeper understanding of Marla’s perspective, even though she
    would have a pretty insightful view of Tyler. A view that we should want if we truly wanted
    to understand him more accurately, or understand the deeper implications of the story. But
    we don’t. Instead, Tyler frames her emotions as the butt of a mean joke, while seeing his
    emotions as valid. On a repeat viewing, instead of breaking down the movie, we’re sucked
    deeper into Tyler’s narrative, deeper into his perspective. We’re not just seeing puzzle
    pieces fit together in the order that Tyler has preordained. We’re FEELING how he wants
    us to feel about every character. Rewatching scenes with Marla, which should
    make us empathize with her since we now know that Tyler is treating her like garbage, instead
    make her the object of ridicule. Fincher’s choice of angles, tone, and pacing still privilege
    Tyler’s point of view. Look how often Marla is framed with the camera
    looking down on her. And how often Tyler is framed looking down on us. We are rewatching
    the exact same scene was saw on first viewing, telling ourselves that we’re watching something
    different this time, since we have new knowledge. But the same argument as before–that Marla
    is a trash human and sucks and Tyler hates her, and we should hate her too–is only reinforced
    on this viewing. Jack’s inflection seems clueless. “What
    are you getting out of all of this?” On first viewing, that inflection was understood
    to be Jack’s honest confusion about why Marla is hanging around with Tyler. On second
    viewing, there’s a surface level reading, if we take Tyler’s narrative at his word,
    that Jack is schizophrenic and is truly confused. But that’s not what’s going on. Because
    Jack is not there. Jack is absent. That’s Tyler talking. Tyler is present. Tyler is
    telling us this story. By acting ‘confused’ Tyler keeps us from empathizing with Marla
    in this situation and instead we empathize with Jack, because we’ve seen this scene
    before and were just as confused as he is. It’s relatable! It keeps us from acknowledging
    that in the actual world of the story, it’s Marla who is infinitely more confused because
    she’s dealing with this irrational obnoxious person. “Talk to me!” Tyler knows exactly
    how much of his asshole persona he can reveal without losing his intended audience. And
    this movie has an intended audience. This movie is not meant for everyone. This movie
    is meant for “guys like you and me.” It’s for nice guys who know they should be getting
    more out of life. “I used to be such a nice guy.” Except Jack was never a nice guy,
    because he never existed. The mythical nice guy is simply a convenient
    tool in Tyler’s rhetorical utility belt. This movie is for guys who were never nice,
    but want to claim: “It’s the world’s fault I’m not nice anymore.” Guys who
    want a fabricated excuse for their toxic, abusive behavior. On the fourth viewing, Marla is still gross.
    On the sixth viewing Jack still provides excuses for Tyler’s actions. On the eighth viewing
    we still disavow that Brad Pitt is a Hollywood sex symbol, so we can pretend he’s just
    a regular guy like us. Because no matter how many times you watch
    it, Tyler is still in control of the story. At best the narrative constructs him as a
    Messiah, at worst he’s misguided but still “right” about society *wink.* Tyler narrates
    scenes that literally did not happen, so that we don’t even have a chance to question
    Tyler’s lies. Tyler has to show us the provocative fight first. After all, seeing someone assaulting
    themselves, or pretend to be assaulted in public, would make them seem ridiculous. This
    is provocative. But from a more objective angle, we see it’s simply a dork pretending
    to get beat up. By the time Tyler shows us this he’s preached so much about how terrible,
    absurd, and messed up society is, we’re primed to see this kind of behavior as justified,
    or even noble. If society is absurd, the means of rebelling
    might as well be equally absurd. This is why, even on a repeat viewing, when we know that
    Tyler is punching himself in this scene, we don’t think “That’s a sad guy punching
    himself.” We still think: “This is cool and funny and different. This is the origin
    story of the cool secret club I know about.” We disavow critical thought, in favor of being
    part of the in group. “Losing all hope was freedom.” Tyler talks a lot about freedom, about being
    free. But the kind of freedom Tyler is talking about isn’t found in Enlightenment philosophy
    or the Declaration of Independence or even in ads for oversized American pickup trucks.
    Journalist I. A. R. Wylie interviewed a young man who could have been a real life candidate
    for Project Mayhem when he said: “We are free from freedom.” Wylie elaborates: “He
    meant that he no longer had to make his own decisions or even think his own thoughts.”
    Wylie was interviewing a young Nazi who made that proud statement shortly before World
    War Two. Eric Hoffer, in The True Believer: Thoughts on the Nature of Mass Movements,
    explains that this kind of freedom “is not freedom of self-expression and self-realization,
    but freedom from the terrible burden of an autonomous existence. They want freedom from
    ‘the fearful burden of free choice.’” “It’s only after we’ve lost everything
    that we’re free to do anything. The idea of free will, of free choice, is antithetical
    to Tyler’s worldview. “Freedom” means having a gun placed at the back of your head
    and being told what to do. And, conveniently for Tyler, he sets up a system which strips
    everyone else of choice, leaving Tyler with the ability to choose for them. You are free to punch, you are free to blow
    things up, but you’re not free to do just anything. To Tyler, these violent, physical
    categories of knowledge are good. But there are categories of knowledge which he finds
    distasteful, which he wants to eliminate. Tyler: “Why do you guys like you and I know
    what a duvet is?” Simply knowing what the word duvet means is immoral to Tyler. “Guys
    like you and me” should not be allowed to know what a duvet is. We are men. We are hard.
    Duvets are prohibited for “guys like you and me.” Why does Jack feel so empty? Why does Jack
    feel so lost? Does he feel crushed by the superficiality and alienation inherent in
    capitalism? Does he have a terminal illness? Is it because the word duvet exists? It’s
    because Jack isn’t real. He’s a straw man whose mortal enemy is a fancy word for
    blanket. Let’s take a close look at one of the characters
    Tyler indoctrinates. A character whose life Tyler believes Tyler changes for the better.
    “What are we doing?” “Human sacrifice.” In the only scene where we actually see Tyler
    intimately engage with one of his converts, Tyler drags this stranger, Raymond, outside
    while he’s working, and puts a gun to the back of Raymond’s head. Then, based solely
    on the fact that Raymond has an expired community college ID in his wallet, Tyler assumes a
    heck of a lot about Raymond’s hopes and dreams, gets him to admit under duress that
    he gave up on his goal of being a veterinarian, then threatens that if Raymond doesn’t go
    back to school, Tyler will find Raymond and murder him. Very inspiring stuff. We know that Tyler just wants to push this
    guy to be his best self. We know that Tyler is trying to motivate men to be men. To take
    charge of their lives. We know this, because Tyler knows this. Raymond does not know this. We do not know
    Raymond’s perspective. We do not establish his mundane job. We do not see him standing
    behind the counter as Tyler rushes in like an ordinary robber. If we heard Raymond’s
    side of the story, he would tell us about the time a lunatic robbed him, spouted a bunch
    of pseudo philosophical BS — “The question, Raymond, was what did you want to be?” — only
    stole his drivers license, then left. Tyler tells us a story about how Tyler is a messiah.
    We are left assuming that Tyler changed this man’s life for the better. We do not know
    that. Whether or not Raymond actually gets his degree, doesn’t matter. “Imagine how
    he feels.” Tyler doesn’t want us to imagine how Raymond actually feels. Tyler wants us
    to imagine how Tyler wants Raymond to feel. “Tomorrow will be the most beautiful day
    of Raymond K Hessel’s life. His breakfast will taste better than any meal you and I
    have ever tasted.” In reality, Raymond is not liberated. In reality, Raymond has no
    choice, but to follow Tyler’s orders. Raymond hasn’t been watching this movie, so Raymond
    has no reason to trust Tyler, no reason to buy into his arcane plan. Tyler asks Raymond a straightforward question:
    “Raymond K Hessel, 1320 SE Spanning Apartment A. Small cramped basement apartment?” The
    answer to his question is “Yes,” but since Tyler is telling this story, Raymond answers
    “How did you know?” Tyler is telling us about a time when he robbed someone and pointed
    a gun at the back of their head, and in telling this story, Tyler needs to emphasize that
    he knows everything, so he has this person, in the middle of what they think might be
    their last moments on earth, praise Tyler’s intelligence. Tyler is right about everything.
    “How did you know?” “Because they give s**tty basement apartments letters instead
    of numbers.” I don’t even know if that’s true, but we don’t have time to question
    it. Because Tyler is never wrong. “I just can’t win with you, can I?” Tyler wins
    in every situation no matter how absurd. Everything Tyler sets out to achieve, he accomplishes,
    because this is Tyler’s story and he is the hero. “Tyler, you are by far the most
    interesting single serving friend I’ve ever met.” Even his victims think so. “How
    did you know?” Even on a second viewing. “How did you know?” Notice how, when Tyler
    was trying to ask Raymond “what did you want to be?” It takes multiple questions,
    and the threat of physical violence. “What’d you study, Raymond?” “Stuff.” “Stuff?
    Were the midterms hard?” But when it comes to praising Tyler, Raymond’s response is
    immediate. “How did you know?” Watching Tyler drift through the story is like watching
    someone play a video game with god-mode on. Raymond’s existence in Tyler’s story serves
    Tyler. Later, we see a door covered in drivers licenses. We never see Raymond again. Raymond
    is reduced to a bureaucratic identification card. If he did not go back to school, he’s
    dead because Tyler killed him. If he did go back to school, he’s dead because he is
    no longer in control of his own life. He has been sacrificed to appease Tyler. Raymond’s
    name and face are present. But Raymond’s point of view is absent. “You had to give it to him.” No we don’t.
    Jack is there to put up the FLIMSIEST defense. Except Jack is not there. Tyler tells us he’s
    there, to reassure us that we’re questioning this ridiculous situation along with Jack.
    “That wasn’t funny! Wha the f*** was the point of that?” But Tyler is holding the
    gun. There’s no actual voice of reason in this scene. Only in the telling of it, for
    our sake. The underground fight clubs are supposedly
    formed in search of some truth, in search of freedom, but they are predicated on deception.
    “The first rule of fight club is you do not talk about fight club. The second rule
    of fight club is you do not talk about fight club.” By repeating that rule, Tyler is
    inviting us to break it. His cadence even punctuates the sentence as if to say “You
    do not” period “talk about fight club.” Talk about fight club. Do not, period. Talk
    about fight club. We are a group of people who want to break society’s rules. Here
    are rules. Break them. And of course the rules are being broken. That’s the only way the
    group can grow. The rule itself prompts members to disavow: “The first rule is, I’m not
    supposed to talk about it.” But here I am, talking about it. Later, when Tyler calls
    out his followers for breaking the rules, it’s not to punish them. Rather–after a
    brief interruption by an authority figure whose rules they’ve been breaking this whole
    time–Tyler rewards his men with a new development: “This week, each one of you has a homework
    assignment” — the beginning of Project Mayhem. Tyler not only expected people to
    talk publicly about Fight Club, he already had the next step of his plan ready, for when
    more recruits showed up. Congratulations, you have all been promoted in the corporate
    structure of Project Mayhem. Also, Tyler only says “Do not talk about fight club” twice.
    And as Tyler himself says: “Promise.” “I just said, I promise.” “That’s
    THREE TIMES you promise.” For Tyler, being a loser is the first step
    toward being a winner. Whether it’s Jack’s status as a loser with no life. Or literally
    losing a fight. So Tyler has a plan. Is it a plan to succeed? To get a win under his
    belt to strengthen his leadership position? Nope! “You’re gonna start a fight, and
    you’re gonna lose.” So Tyler recruits people who are already losers, then immediately
    gives them a losing task that will make them feel even more powerless. This increases their
    dependence on Tyler, and increases his power base. Like the way the ringleaders of Gamergate
    target insecure gamers, then tell them that all their problems are caused by womz, people
    of color, and polygon tiddies not being big enough. Or Teal Swan, the YouTuber who preys
    on people with suicidal thoughts, gets them to pay her big chunks of money for “therapy,”
    then encourages them to kill themselves by telling them to “visualize killing yourself.”
    For Tyler, feeling like a loser is the basis for identity, and the first step into reclaiming
    masculine superiority. This conflating of winning and losing parallels the way neo-Nazis
    romanticize World War Two, a contest the Nazis resoundingly lost. Or the way pro-slavery
    Americans romanticize the Civil War, a contest pro-slavery Americans resoundingly lost. In
    his 2006 essay about Fight Club and fascism titled Masochism and Terror, Andrew Hewitt
    writes: “This internalization of loss–this paradoxical affirmation of lack as the very
    basis of identity–marks the apotheosis of ‘the novel assertion that it is precisely
    this loss of the war that is characteristically German… [T]he fascist internalizes lack–ontologizes
    alienation–as the very condition of German subjectivity.” Being a loser becomes the
    basis for identity. Instead of feeling shame or regret about war and loss, the fascist
    doubles down, forming their identity in opposition to an “Other” who has cheated them out
    of victory. Hewitt continues with this quote from Nietzsche: “Every sufferer instinctively
    seeks a cause for his suffering… more exactly, an agent: still more specifically, a guilty
    agent who is susceptible to suffering–in short, some living thing upon which he can,
    on some pretext or other, vent his affects, actually or in effigy.” Tyler is the sufferer
    who points to society, consumerism, women, or whatever’s convenient in the moment,
    as the cause of his suffering. This is why he narrates Jack’s life as so utterly pathetic.
    As suicidal. As practically a zombie. Tyler needs Jack to seem powerless, because Tyler
    is going to show us, through Jack, the path to power. Assuming that Project Mayhem actually
    succeeds and resets debt to zero–which is itself an absurd, fetishized plan–then Tyler
    will succeed in reordering society based around loss. Based around lack. A lack of economics,
    a lack of structure, a lack of order. And he happens to be the leader of an organization
    that is ready to step in and impose its own economics, its own structure, its own order. Man, cops suck! “F***ing pigs!” But also
    we are the cops. In 1999, when asked “Did you see [Tyler]
    in terms of the literary device of the unreliable narrator?”, Fincher said: “Oh, he’s
    totally unreliable.” Fight Club is extra frustrating because not only is our narrator
    unreliable, but Fincher himself is also an unreliable storyteller. Unlike Rashomon or
    The Last Jedi, where directors Kurosawa and Rian Johnson utilized unreliable narrators
    to blatantly call out the subjectivity of storytelling, Fincher indulges in subjective
    storytelling. He uses clever dialogue and flat acting to misdirect our attention. “Did
    you know that if you mixed equal parts gasoline and frozen orange juice concentrate you can
    make napalm?” “No I did not know that, is that true?” “That’s right.” So
    instead of thinking “oh my god he’s a terrorist” we–prompted by Jack’s dialogue–think
    “wow, what a quirky guy.” “Wow, that Nazi so casually talks about ethnic cleansing!
    That’s interesting!” Fincher structures his shots, visuals, and narrative to impose
    his order on the viewer. “I just love the idea of this omniscience, like the camera
    just kind of goes over here perfectly. There’s none of that documentary kind of feel to it.
    It’s very much like what’s happening is doomed to happen. And I like that as the psychological
    underpinning.” Fincher’s style does not open things up to interpretation or question.
    He has a point of view, an objective, and he will not allow you to stray. Just as Tyler,
    in telling his story, has a point of view, an objective, and he will not allow you to
    stray. Fincher utilizes a structure that director
    Peter Watkins has termed the Monoform, a linear, predetermined format meant to drive the audience
    toward a specific conclusion. “Which is simply a name I give to the basic structure
    of what we see on television and in a majority sense most of what we see in the commercial
    cinema today. Of course it’s a series of rapidly edited pictures, constantly displacing
    us from one thing to another, from one subject, one visual image with all its associated metaphorical,
    symbolic, personal meanings. Different weight of information on screen, different mass,
    different shape, different movement, and we’re asked to deal with that, usually in five,
    six or seven seconds, which is the average cutting rate. And you change to the next,
    change to the next, and so on and so on, endless barrage of visual information, which is of
    course being accompanied by an audio barrage, all being thrust at the audience, in a one
    way monolinear push from beginning to end.” Fight Club not only drives toward a foregone
    conclusion, Fincher even shows us the ending, without proper context, at the beginning.
    “What the audience is to feel or decide at the endpoint here, is already determined
    at the beginning point, on all sorts of levels.” By showing us the ending out of context at
    the beginning of the film, and then dropping in key information throughout the film, Fincher
    makes us feel as if we are undergoing a process of discovery. In actuality, Fincher withholds
    key information so that we continue to like Tyler, so that we never think of him as the
    terrorist leader he truly is. “Why do you think I blew up your condo!” We are given
    the illusion of choice, but we lack choice when confronted with the monoform. “The
    whole purpose of 20th century Mass Audio Visual Media is that it is not predicated on incorporating
    the ideas, feelings, experiences, subjectivity, memory, knowledge, wisdom of the audience,
    or the viewer or viewers, and engulfing them and taking them into the process, and sharing.
    20th century mass audio visual media MAVM is designed to withold those, to push those
    away, and to instead engulf the people with this fabricated, fragmented, arbitrary process,
    where the person’s participation is held out. And that’s why everything is moving
    very fast. To hold back any opportunity for the person to have time to come in, and enter
    the material and challenge it or negotiate with it or anything.” When Tyler encourages us to question the authority
    inherent in consumerism, we as an audience disavow that there are other forms of authority
    we should question as well. For example: Tyler’s authority, and the police state he’s trying
    to create. When it comes to questioning *Tyler’s* authority, Jack–our standin–only provides
    one very specific type of quesiton. “What do you want me to do? You want me to just
    hit you?” “Come on, just do me this one favor?” “Why?” “Why why do we need
    bunkbeds?” “What why? What’re you talking about?” He frames his questions as a child
    asking a parent for their reasoning, instead of actually challenging Tyler’s authority.
    Jack never challenges Tyler, never gives an alternate point of view. Always asks for Tyler’s
    justification, giving him another platform to lecture at us. And he always accepts that
    justification, prompting us to accept that justification. “You had to give it to him.”
    If Jack had a YouTube channel today he’d probably be a centrist, insisting: “I’m
    just trying to hear both sides.” Tyler dazzles new recruits with his cool, seemingly anti-authoritarian
    message while simultaneously stepping into the role of authority figure. Tyler uses a flat, cool tone of voice to seduce
    us, whether he’s playing Tyler or playing Jack. “In a catastrophic emergency, you’re
    taking giant panicked breaths. Suddenly you become euphoric, docile. You accept your fate.”
    Tyler lulls us into feeling docile, into accepting the fate he’s laid out for us. Brecht wrote
    about the alienating effect of certain kinds of meta theater. Regarding actors tone of
    voice, Brecht said: “[The actor’s] way of speaking has to be free from parasonical
    sing-song and from all those cadences which lull the spectator so that the sense gets
    lost.” Tyler and Jack utilize the exact kind of sing-song cadence that Brecht denounces.
    “You are not a beautiful and unique snowflake. You are the same decaying organic matter as
    everyone else.” The soundtrack to the movie, which you can buy at any major music retailer,
    even includes a bonus track, co-written by Fincher. Listen, as Tyler Durden coos a bunch
    of self-help advice at us. “It’s only after you’ve lost everything that you’re
    free to do anything.” If that isn’t sing-song-y, I don’t know what is. Whereas Brecht’s goal
    was to alienate us from the narrative, Tyler’s goal is to pull us further into the narrative,
    further into his world. Tyler doesn’t want to elevate the spectator, and seemingly neither
    does Fincher. The formal aspects of Fincher’s films–more
    “insider knowledge,” such as editing, framing, and even the slightest camera move–are
    ritualistically fetishized by cinephiles. For example, this youtube video: “Did you
    see that? It’s a very small thing, and it’s easy to miss. What is it, exactly? Well, it’s
    a camera move.” Fincher’s perfectionism and artificiality are admired, to the point
    where any ethical implications about how these techniques are used, become irrelevant. I
    don’t mean to call out any youtube channel, specifically. Nerdwriter does great work.
    I’m trying to highlight how–when a director is able to trick us, or seduce us with flashy
    film production techniques and visual effects–we invest more emotionally, not just in that
    narrative, but in the very means of production, themselves. Film has always been a constructed
    medium, but the depth of Fincher’s visual manipulation is unprecedented, especially
    since he uses these techniques for the most basic dialogue scenes. Even digital editing
    techniques that we would never spot with the naked eye are fetishized. “We’re not just
    editing shots together anymore, we’re editing pixel by pixel.” Humans are manipulated
    on screen, pixel by pixel, to manipulate us, the audience at home. Even though it feels
    kind of Big Brother-ish to me, film enthusiasts only show more reverence, more admiration
    for Fincher. Metz wrote about this type of film nerd, which he refers to as the cinema
    fetishist. “The cinema fetishist is the person who is enchanted at what the machine
    is capable of, at the theater of shadows as such. For the establishment of his full potency
    for cinematic enjoyment he must think at every moment of the force of presence the film has
    and of the absence on which this force is constructed.” One might assume that behind
    the scenes videos, directors commentaries, and YouTube videos explaining the meaning
    behind a movie would strip away the artifice, but to the cinephile obtaining this sacred
    knowledge only adds to the depth of the film, and their enjoyment. Just as we want to participate
    in the Tyler Durden power fantasy, so we want to participate in the Fincher-as-director
    power fantasy. Wouldn’t it be fun to have all that control?? While his more recent films have a cleaner,
    sterile look, for Fight Club, Fincher sought a more gritty, “authentic” look. [Cinematographer] Jeff Cronenweth and I…
    talked about making it a dirty-looking movie, kind of grainy. When we processed it, we stretched
    the contrast to make it kind of ugly, a little bit of underexposure, a little bit resilvering,
    and using new high-contrast print socks and stepping all over it so it has a dirty patina.
    What’s resilvering? Rebonding silver that’s been bleached away
    during the processing of the print and then rebonding it to the print.
    What does that do? Makes it really dense. The blacks become incredibly
    rich and kind of dirty. We did it on Seven a little, just to make the prints nice. But
    it’s really in this more for making it ugly. We wanted to present things fairly realistically. So much effort to make a perfectly “ugly”
    product. “Even the glass dishes with tiny bubbles and imperfections.” To Tyler, life
    is trash, so the film looks trashy. So there’s this apparent contradiction in
    Fight Club. On one hand, Fincher’s desire to manipulate, pixel by pixel to create the
    perfect, idealized image. And on the other hand, this trash aesthetic–a desire to portray
    the world as a giant pile of garbage. These ideas may feel out of sync, but there is an
    ideology that thoroughly embraces this contradiction. Here we go, this is where we blatantly connect
    fight club to fascism! Fascism. Sorry, was that too much of a hard turn? Okay, let me
    set up this section about fascism with a quote about fascism. David Fincher said a movie
    set’s a fascist dictatorship, when he said: “I think a movie set’s a fascist dictatorship.” Andrew Hewitt writes: “We have forgotten
    the proximity of totalitarian thought to the eco-logic of the compost heap. When the narrator
    of Fight Club tells us that he ‘wanted to put a bullet through the eyes of every panda
    that wouldn’t fuck to save its species,’ the affinity of that eco-logic with a murderous
    eugenicism becomes exaggeratedly apparent.” And regarding the way Tyler turns human fat
    into explosives, Hewitt writes: “This trope has itself been recycled–this time from the
    proto-fascist writings of the Futurist F. T. Marinetti, in whose writings we find ‘the
    plainest, most violent of Futurist symbols”: ‘In Japan they carry on the strangest of
    trades: the sale of coal made from human bones. All their powderworks are engaged in producing
    a new explosive substance more lethal than any yet known. This terrible new mixture has
    its principle element coal made from bones with the quality of violently absorbing gases
    and liquids.’” Fascists and proto-fascists have always viewed humanity as disposable,
    as single-serving, as garbage. Of course an ideology that views humans as compost would
    devise policies that lead to the glorification of death in battle, mass graves, and death
    camps. The blonde haired, blue eyed superman is fetish object, denying the lack of perfection
    in all humans; denying the alienating, painful existence of living under an autocratic regime. Leni Riefenstahl, the Nazi documentarian,
    was hyper-aware of the fetish-value of photogenic young men. While filming her Nazi propaganda
    films she got upset that so many actual Nazis didn’t live up to her aesthetic expectations.
    Prominent Nazi Albert Speer recalled: “I was present when Riefenstahl, in a restaurant
    with her staff, was a little bit frank and made some mocking remarks about the bellies
    [of the Nazi Brownshirts] not being so good for photographs or some such thing.” Riefenstahl
    mocked literal Nazis for not being ideal enough. Riefenstahl biographer Stephen Bach adds:
    “[Speer] conspired with her to hide the [Brownshirt] potbellies she mocked behind
    thousands of swastika flags.” In this instance, the ultimate fetish symbol for Nazis–the
    Swastika–literally obscures actual, pot-bellied Nazis. Nazis with pot bellies are present
    at the rally. But they are absent from Riefenstahl’s film. Idealized Nazi imagery is present in
    Riefenstahl’s film. But it is absent from reality. Tyler’s body–actually sexy, sexy Brad Pitt’s
    body–obscures Tyler’s true form–that of doughy Edward Norton. Tyler invites us to
    mock Gucci models, disavowing Brad Pitt’s own highly sexualized body. In fight club,
    at least one conventionally unattractive member is allowed. Who happens to be the only member
    who dies a violent death. Bob’s body–which his fascist buddies considered grotesque and
    wrong–is re-coded by those same buddies after his death; recycled into a perfect symbol
    of fascism. “In death, a member of Project Mayhem has a name.” Yes, Robert Paulson
    truly achieved glory by smashing the windows of a Starbucks coffee, and then getting shot
    in the head. Tyler tells us he had it all: “I had it
    all” However, Tyler is aware that he’s missing something that society expects an
    adult male to have: a wife. His father even suggests this as a next step: Dad, now what?
    He says, I don’t know, get married.” But he refuses, for abstract reasons. “I can’t
    get married. I’m a 30 year old boy.” I know I’m thirty years old and it’s like
    time to get married but I’m only thirty years old I can’t get married. Tyler holds this anti-romance and anti-sex
    attitude, despite the constant sexual dialogue and imagery–especially homoerotic, phallic
    and anal imagery–splattered all over the film. But none of the sexual innuendo in the
    dialogue or imagery is ever titillating. It’s usually disgusting. It’s almost always played
    either flatly, or ironically. “Could check your prostate?” “I think I’m okay.”
    Powerful sexual dialogue is usually heard over scenes of violence. “Sometimes all
    you could hear were the flat hard packing sounds over the yelling. Or the wet choke
    when someone caught their breath and sprayed.” But any kind of emotional or vulnerable sexual
    dialogue is usually associated with impotence and disgust. “You cry now.” “Strangers
    with this kind of honesty make me go a big rubbery one.” And in the void left behind
    in his mind where sex would exist, Tyler finds human suffering. “I’m so close to the
    end and all I want is to get laid for the last time.” It’s ironic that Chloe is talking
    about sex, because sex is not what arouses Jack here. He’s getting off on her suffering.
    Immediately after that, while talking about the meetings, Tyler talks in a sing-song voice
    about how it makes him feel. “Every evening I died, and every evening I was born again.”
    Tyler is referring to his orgasm. The pain he witnesses in these groups is the pornography
    he needs to reach climax. When he “dies,” he’s experiencing “la petit mort.” The
    little death. Which is a fancy term that means “the sensation of orgasm as likened to death.”
    When he’s resurrected, or rises again… he’s talking about his dick. In framing the story, Fincher visually links
    sexual desire with physical illness. It’s very telling that Chloe and Bob are both the
    most emotionally honest and open characters in the entire movie, and the only characters
    who die in Tyler’s telling of it. Not to mention, they are the characters most guilty
    of transgressing the gender binary: Bob, with his massive breasts and missing testicles,
    and Chloe, whose femininity has been ravaged by her illness, assuming she presented as
    “feminine” in the first place. God forbid Tyler acknowledges any kind of sexual curiosity
    outside the heteronormative binary. Tyler strives to make sex undesirable; to
    make sexual pleasure feel unattractive and pathetic. It’s possible to read Fight Club
    as homoerotic, however, there’s no actual love or attraction between men. Despite the
    constant homoerotic imagery, he seems completely uninterested in any kind of sex. The most
    homoerotic moments are between Tyler and Tyler. Even Marla seems like a toy at best. Marla is portrayed as disgusting, haggard,
    unkempt. Fincher does everything he can to make us feel that Marla is stinky, and once
    again links sexual desire to physical illness. “This is cancer, right?” Her sex scenes
    are so depraved–”I haven’t been f***ed like that since grade school”–so extreme,
    or so abstract, they’re devoid of any conventionally erotic imagery. This is not sex for pleasure.
    This is sex as performance. Tyler is performing heterosexuality. Sex for the sake of telling
    his friends: “I banged that chick.” Marla is never attractive. Except for one instance.
    But before we get to that, let’s go behind the green door. In the novel Fight Club, there’s mention
    of various doors: orange, blue, green. But Fincher only keeps the GREEN door in his version.
    “Now we’re going to open the green door.” Behind the Green Door was a pornographic movie
    released in 1972. It was a massive success, and helped commodify porn by bringing it into
    the mainstream. The movie Behind the Green Door is the story of an underground group
    of criminals who dress in all black in order to carry out an anarchic mission. They kidnap
    people and force them to perform at a sex club. “Ladies and gentlemen, you are about
    to witness the ravishment of a woman who has been abducted. A woman whose initial fear
    and anxiety have mellowed into curious expectation.” Within the film, the green door itself comes
    to symbolize an entry point into a safe space, similar to the support groups. Outside this
    safe space–in the outer world–is sexual repression, anxiety, patriarchy. But in here,
    on this stage, the participants find a safe space to pursue pleasure. Sexual gratification
    for the female main character is framed as positive. It’s telling that the support
    group leader in Fight Club says we’re going to open our green doors, and soon after, Chloe
    talks specifically about her *sexual* desires in front of the group. Clearly, Fincher is
    drawing a link between the two. But I don’t think it’s simply the pursuit of sexual
    pleasure that links Fight Club and Behind the Green Door. Before the main character engages in an orgy
    on stage, she undergoes a kind of guided meditation, led by a woman whose dialogue is oddly similar
    to the kinds of things Tyler says. “Poor child, I know exactly how you feel. I’m
    going to tell you everything that’s going to take place, so there’s no need to be
    frightened. I’m your friend.” Both characters use a soothing tone of voice to coax the audience
    stand-in into doing things they wouldn’t otherwise be okay with. In addition to the
    massage lady, as the performance begins, a disembodied voice tells us to obey. “Remember,
    you are sworn to observe silence. If you break this rule, you will be dealt with severely.”
    The implication becomes: obey the rules and you will find pleasure. “With the knowledge
    that you are powerless to stop the performance, just relax, and enjoy yourself to the fullest
    extent.” Just as Tyler’s words and deeds give us the illusion of agency or choice in
    his theatre of destruction, so too, this announcer’s assumption that we could somehow interfere
    helps us feel as though we have agency. As though we could somehow interrupt a movie
    that’s already been shot and distributed. In Behind the Green Door, we have an authority
    figure giving the main character–our standin–the freedom to enjoy something transgressive:
    her own sexuality; permission to enjoy something that she should already be free to enjoy.
    In Fight Club, we have an authority figure who gives the main character–our standin–freedom
    to enjoy something transgressive: terrorism; permission to enjoy something that is antithetical
    to the very concept of freedom. And these are the themes that link Behind
    the Green Door and Fight Club: this tension between pursuing what you want, but also looking
    to an authority figure for permission to pursue, or looking to them for a list of pre-approved
    pleasures you may pursue. The green door metaphor used in the support
    group is meant to help people cope with long lasting emotional pain, or chronic physical
    illness. In the chemical burn scene, Tyler has set up a false parallel to the support
    groups. Tyler’s goal in this scene is to make this act of physical assault seem comparable
    with the existential and chronic pain experienced by members of the support group. Tyler, who
    is a physical and emotional abuser, manages to make his actions seem as inevitable as
    death by terminal cancer. Those support group members do not have a simple, immediate means
    of alleviating their pain. They cannot just pour vinegar on their cancer, or missing testicles,
    or tuberculosis. But to a naive audience member who hasn’t had to cope with long-lasting
    emotional or physical trauma, who is looking for a reason to claim victimhood, the comparison
    may feel attractive . Tyler “feels” like he has the answers–”You can run water over
    your hand to make it worse, or, look at me, or you can use vinegar to neutralize the burn”–even
    though he’s concocted an absurd scenario with a predetermined conclusion. And this happens to be the only moment in
    the entire film where Marla is presented as sexually desirable in a visual sense. Jack
    makes one last ditch effort to block out the pain and pursue pleasure. And this is the
    moment that “Jack” closes his green door. He stops trying to escape to his safe space,
    and never bothers trying to go there again. He’s left with a scar which resembles vaginal
    lips. Sexual imagery recoded as a mark of pain. A fetish object that denies the lack
    of pleasure. Shortly afterwards, he denies Marla the sex that she’s come to expect.
    “Are we done?” “Yeah, we’re done.” We see her again in the Paper Street house,
    but there’s no sexual tension anymore. He has metaphorically closed his door to his
    pleasure center, and chosen to pursue pain. Tyler’s safe space is not just a *room*. Not
    just a single location where you’re prohibited from saying the word ‘duvet.’ It’s a world
    where you’re prohibted from saying the word ‘duvet,’ or doing anything else he doesn’t
    approve of. If Fincher set out to tell a cautionary tale
    about the way we are so easily manipulated by media, celebrities, and people in positions
    of power, then he failed because his target audience–guys like us–clearly didn’t get
    that message. I mean, they went on to actually create fight
    clubs. Or if he set out to make a movie that exploits that same bro-ey audience, and he’s
    laughing at anyone who enjoys it for being such gullible losers, then… okay? Good on
    you? Whatever the meaning may be to you, or me,
    or anyone else, Fight Club is unquestionably a powerful narrative. It’s more than just
    Fincher using his commercial director skills to sell us fascism. It’s more than just
    a tale of insecure masculinity. In Hollywood, sometimes you hear the saying:
    “We’re not in the entertainment business, we’re in the empathy business.” The optimistic reading of that statement is:
    we’re looking to find the emotionally honest core to our story; that we work hard to strip
    away artifice and deliver a meaningful product. The cynical, commercial reading of that statement
    is that we’re simply taking a generic product, then wrapping it in packaging that signals
    to the audience that they are supposed to feel empathy. And I’ll give you one guess
    whether or not Fincher is cynical about commercials, as one of the most successful commercial directors
    of all time: “I’m extremely cynical about commercials and about selling things and about
    the narcissistic ideals of what we’re supposed to be. I guess in my heart I was hoping people
    are too smart to fall for that stuff.” I talked a lot about how narrow and controlled
    Tyler’s point of view is in framing this story. There are very, very few moments where
    his narrative slips. Very few times where it feels like Fincher is commenting ON Tyler,
    instead of Fincher simply having fun as the one controlling the story THROUGH Tyler. Here’s
    one example: In the first act, we see a woman with a shaved head in the background. She’s
    there again when Chloe speaks, and these two seconds are the only time we really get a
    good look at her, in focus. We may assume Chloe has a shaved head, but she keeps hers
    covered. In a movie where the vast majority of shots are highly motivated, distorted,
    emotionally jarring… this shot is quiet, matter of fact. Almost an hour and a half
    later, we see members of Project Mayhem shave their heads. By the end, Tyler has a shaved
    head. One woman’s actual experience with cancer is these white guys’ idea of a ‘fun
    haircut.’ In appropriating this look, Tyler and his men attempt to appropriate a symbol
    of victimhood itself. He goes from appropriating the pain of being in a support group to appropriating
    the haircut of a woman with cancer. As if to say: “Look, my haircut shows that society
    is killing me! Society is committing a genocide against meeee! One might call it… a white
    genocide!” As their actions escalate from pranks toward straight up terrorism, they
    escalate from simple appropriation of victimhood to the colonization of victimhood. Their home
    base even resembles a work camp, or concentration camp, as if to constantly remind Tyler’s
    followers that they “deserve” to identify as oppressed. There’s no frontier left to conquer, there’s
    no more “New World” to pillage. So now, we plunder hearts and minds. This “colonization
    of victimhood” allows Tyler and his men to justify pretty much anything, because now
    they can claim they have been wronged, by simply pointing to this visual marker: the
    shaved head. Tyler is hell bent on teaching young men that they’ve been disenfranchised.
    That their feelings are cancer. That love is death. And that ultimately, your death–in
    service of Tyler–is freedom. And that’s just sad, more than anything else. Sad that
    we live in an age of technological miracles, yet despite that, a lot of the people who
    benefit most directly from society’s advantages would rather spend their time tearing others
    down, pushing people out, stripping freedom from other people, and dehumanizing them. Sad that the leader of the free world actually
    did come up with an alternate personality, named John Barron, so he could tell everyone
    about how great he is, in the third person. “Over the years I’ve used aliases. If
    you’re trying to buy land, you use different names.” “What names did you use?” “I
    would use–I actually used the name Barron.” And he did manage to fool reporters. But also,
    he never shuts up about what a victim he is. How “unfair” everyone is to him. “What
    you said is so insulting to me. It’s a very terrible thing you said.” How–actually–YOU
    are the racist. “That’s such a racist question.” But as I’ve been wrapping up this video,
    the universe supplied an even more apt comparison. Gavin McInnes–founder of the violent, racist
    Proud Boys, a group with obvious inspiration from Fight Club–released a video to say he’s
    quitting the Proud Boys. He’s trying to distance himself from the group, after nine
    of his followers were arrested for assault shortly following an appearance by McInnes
    himself, at the Metropolitan Republican Club in New York City. At that appearance, McInnes
    reeancted the assassination of a Japanese socialist as part of a “comedy” routine,
    because he’s not funny. The arrests only came after New York Police were criticized
    for protecting the Proud Boys. “I was never the leader, only the founder.” I know that
    I founded this group, but I did not lead this group. As we watch Gavin McInnes squirm, trying
    to distance himself from the violent hate group he founded, we see the cowardly selfishness
    of a paternalistic leader who is finally afraid he’ll be held to account. His speech reads
    like a list of the rhetorical devices we’ve been covering in this video. For the entire duration of this thirty six
    minute video, even though he covers a variety of topics, McInnes stands next to a photo
    of one of the Proud Boys, and his wife who happens to be a person of color. He appropriates
    what he sees as the external symbol of her oppression–her skin color–and uses this
    image as a literal prop, as “evidence” that he–Gavin McInnes–is the one who is
    truly oppressed. He has chosen this photo to disavow the fact that his gang targets
    marginalized groups, to disavow his obvious bigotry. Her image is present, but any voice
    from those marginalized groups he targeted are absent. In this age of information, we really do have
    front row seats in our theater of mass destruction thanks to the internet. There’s so much
    news, so much data, so many points of view to sift through. And people in power use that
    to their advantage. Whereas the 20th century version of the Monoform was linear video in
    the form of tightly packaged TV programming or movies, now we have Twitter, Facebook,
    and YouTube, which fragment viewpoints and meaning even more. The very technology that
    isolates us, also advertises itself as the solution to that isolation. I’ve been trying to figure out how I come
    to a conclusions in a video where I’ve specifically pointed out the dangers of driving toward
    a predetermined conclusion. And I think that conclusion is simply: we need to get better,
    as a society, at questioning narratives, questioning authority; stop just asking why, and start
    asking who is benefiting from this story? And the answer in Fight Club is only one person
    benefits: Tyler. Thanks for making it to the end of this very
    long video. And a deep, special thank you to all my patrons who were incredibly patient,
    as this video took a long time to finish. And thanks to all my wonderful friends who
    provided voices for the video. You can check out all their links below, I’m sure you
    recognized a few of them already. And If you want to see more videos like this, or more
    light-hearted funny videos about terrible B-Movies, head on over to patreon dot com,
    where you can support too. And of course if you like this video, feel free to like and
    subscribe, and if you’ve already subscribed, hit that little button so you get a notification
    when I release a video. Until then… bye!

    RETURN OF THE FISH-CONE!! | Prop Hunt #38
    Articles, Blog

    RETURN OF THE FISH-CONE!! | Prop Hunt #38

    November 13, 2019


    Wade: I like how nobody seemed excited at all for their *giggles* team. Mark: *giggles* Bob: I don’t even know I’m with, I was adjusting my mouse sensitivity, okay? Mark: I’m with-I’m with you, Bob. I’m with you. Bob: Oh, Good. Thank God. Mark: Yeah, thank you. Wade: Wait, what? Mark: That’s a lot in faith me! Wade: I dont know if you insulted me or Jack or both there, Bob. Bob: Both, obviously. Jack: Wait, what’s updated about this map? It feels the exact same! Mark: NO, NO! there should be…NO, NO! there should be…
    Wade: It feels the exact same to me too Mark: there should be new-there was new stuff in the picture and the thing IT WAS NEW! Wade: ♪ Prop hunt… ♪
    Bob: This…feels…the same… Mark: No, I swear guys…..YEAH, IT’S DIFFERENT, LOOK!!! Bob: Wait no, no, no, no, no, this is different. This is different. Mark: Over there! Mark: PaPoof Mark: Yeah, it’s different, see? Bob: It’s… It’s largely the same. Mark: Yeah Wade: We’re Underwater again! And it’s the same Mark: No, come on guys, just- we have so many good memories from this map I thought it would be good to start with this cause we haven’t done it in years.
    Wade: No, I have no good memories, you and Bob do. Mark: What are you talking about?! Bob: That’s right! Mark: Yeah. Wade: Yeah, I haven’t forgotten the fish and the cone debacle of 20-four-fif- Mark: 2014 Bob: I feel like we all had a good time that day. Mark: Yeah, it was pretty fun. Wait, are you guys hiding already? Wait a minute… Jack: Yeah. Wade (Sarcastic): No, we were waiting on you to kill us before we decided to go hide Jack: Yeah!
    Mark: Well, that’s awfully kind of you Bob: That would be the civil thing to do, you don’t have to be a prick. Jack: Stop dropping cones, what did they do? Mark: Wait, can you see that? Where are you? Jack: Yeah. Mark: Alright Bob, I’m gonna be scouting from up here, so, if I see any movement- Bob: I’m really certain- I’m fairly certain that they’re in the water Mark: Probably.
    Jack: On an underwater map? That’s stupid. Mark: Yeah…
    Bob: Yeah well, that’s what I was saying, but, you know. Mark: Wo- Mark: What was that sound? Jack: What was that sound?
    Mark: What was that sound? Bob: He just went in the water, I dont know. Wade: That was not a thing… Mark: Was that, was that you Wade? Were you doing a thing over there? Wade: No! Mark: Huh? Jack: I can’t- I can’t see well from my vantage point. Mark Uh huh, so you’re at a vantage- Shut up, phone!
    Bob: Ahh, I know where Jack is. Mark: eeeh uuuh eeeuuu Bob: What a- What a professional, Mark, what a professional. Mark: Arrrhhhhhhhh Bob: Knows to have the phone on silent when you start the recording. Mark: Hang on, I’m keeping an eyeballs out. Bob: Oh hey, somebody’s totally in the cage area Mark: Woah! *Mark desperately yells* Wade: *Squeals* Mark: AWW- Oh! Nailed ya! Oh my eagle eye has finally paid off! Wade: Its not eagle eye when you use a bomb!
    Mark: *Maniacal laughter* Jack: Yeah, he’s right. Mark: Eagle eye-
    Bob: So Jack. Mark: When I’m spotting. Jack: Yes. Bob: Where- Where in here are you, that’s my question. Jack: Lookin’ at ‘cha. Bob: I know, I feel you looking at me. Mark: Bob where-
    Jack: I dunno whos that, who that is Bob: I’m the one in the glass box. Jack: Oh, then no, I’m not in there *slight laughter* Mark: Alright. Bob: Why was this door open? I feel lied to. Mark: That was- That was Wade, Wade was moving the door all around like an iiidiot Wade: By moving the door all around, do you mean I opened it once, and then went through it?
    Mark: *Laughing* Yea- Yeah… Bob: So Mark, where have you been? Where have you been Mark? Mark: I- I’ve been up here, I’ve been watching very closely Mark: So we got a minute and forty-five Mark: I keep seeing-
    Jack: You haven’t been watching- You haven’t been watching closely enough apparently Mark: Wait… Hang on wait a minute…
    Wade: ♪ Do do ♪ Mark: What do you mean?
    Wade: ♪ Do do ♪ Mark: What do you mean Jack?
    Jack: I mean, I just flew past Bob, I think, if that was Mark still up top. Mark: Yeah that was me. Bob: Yeah I was in the water, but. Mark: I can’t see, I can’t see very far into the water, yeah I can’t see very-
    Bob: You didn’t fly past me! Jack: I swam past you! Jack: Just keeps freaking out on me and I can’t see anything! Mark: Alright Bob, I’m gonna hang at the w- Okay, no, that was a fish Bob: (Stuttering)
    Jack: No idea where you guys are! I can’t see you anymore. Mark: Still underwater? Jack: Yeah, but the music’s Jaws. ♪ Dun dun dun dun ♪ Wade: We’re gonna need a bigger boat. We’re gonna need a- Mark: Wade- Wade what’ll it take to sell out your teammate Jack: Nothing
    Wade: Uh. Mark: I offer ten-
    Wade: I’ll do it for- uh. Mark: Ten thousand subscribers? Wade: I was gonna say three, but yeah.
    Jack: Klondike bar? Mark: *laughing* Three- three subscribers, oh wait hang on. Wade: *laughs*
    Mark: I’ll go down to three. Bob: Oh hey, I found Jack. Bob: He’s a little fish running around on the floor.
    Mark: Oh- I see him- ok, I saw him. Mark: He’s still down there- He’s still down there! Jack: *screaming loudly* Woah!! Woah!! Woah!! AH! Argh!!
    Mark: Woah! I saw- I saw blood. Jack: AH! *strange noises*
    Mark: Where’d you go? Where’d you go? Bob: Which- w-where’d he go?
    Mark: Where’d he go? Jack: Nope, nope, nope, nooope. Wade: He’s closer than you might think, but farther than you might like. Mark: Dammit, I can’t throw grenades and stuff underwater. Bob: I know. Wade: That’s not normal fish activity. Mark: Huh.
    Jack: Fish out of water boys! Bob: T-That’s what I was thinking. Mark: Where- where?
    Jack: Heard a grenade. Mark: Okay good. Wait a minute. Oh did- Jack did you get out of the water? Bob: I think he is legitimately out of the water.
    Jack: Yeah…*giggles* Mark: Uh oh. We’re being made a fool of. Jack: *giggling* Yeahh, you are. Bob: I thought you had gotten better at this. Mark: What- no. Wait- aww. Where?
    Jack: I’m right here! Mark: Wait where?!? Wade: Yeah! Yeah! How does it feel not being able to find something there. Jack: I’m up here! I was at the fuckin’- I was on the-
    Mark: Where?? Jack: I was on the thing beside the plant.
    Bob: What?? Mark: Huh?? Wade: He was exactly where you were the cone-fish were before. Bob: I think he was right here Mark. Mark: Where? Bob: Right here. Mark: Oooh. Okay. Jack: I was moving around a good bit though.
    Mark: That would have made sense. Jack: You guys just suck.
    Mark: Thank you.
    Wade: Yeah.
    Wade: You are going to kill me then you’re Wade: Except for whenever y-your gonna kill me than you’re good. Wade: You’re very talented. Jack: No than they suck even more. Wade: Oh. Bob: Hey Mark- Mark: What.
    Wade: Don’t forget he’s still alive. Bob: Look what I found. Mark: What? I- I can’t- Bob: I dunno- I don’t know where you went. I can’t see you anymore. *chuckles* Mark: Yeah I- I d- Jack: Look alive Wade. Bob: I found a- I found a thing… Mark… Bob: I really like this.
    Wade: Wait can you open the chest to get more ammo and guns? Jack: Oh- Bob: Naw I can see a scrub. He don’t know- He don’t know about that chest. Jack: Why would I need them? Wade: Did a car just drive by?
    Mark: Yeah. Bob: Yeah there’s a car animation on the edge of the map. Wade: I’ve never noticed. Jack: Well that’s new. Bob: It’s ‘cuz it’s like louder then it used to be or something. Bob: It used to be very quiet. Jack: Hmm… Bob: I hear a chopper. *Makes bad helicopter imitation* *random noises* Bob: GIT TO ZE CHOPPA! Jack: SOMEONEINHERE No? Okay. You would’ve got super scared if you were in there Mark: Wait what? Bob: Wade no one’s in that corner you don’t need to be in that corner. Jack: What corner’s Wade? Wade: You watching me Bob? You watching me? Bob: No not in the fountain Dumdum. Jack: Marco!
    Mark: Polo! Ah shit. Jack: He’s over there!!
    Mark: Oh no!!! Everyone: *giggles* Wade: Ah!! What if he’s a bike! Mark: Ah. you don’t know that. Bob: I don’t think- I
    don’t think that’s right Wade. Mark: yeah Wade Wade: I don’t know why when I saw it like why can’t I move that particular bicycle? Mark: I don’t know Wade Bob: yeah that’s not the one- that’s not the one Wade Jack: Are you a fish? Bob: No Mark: N-Yes Jack: Are you a barrel? Bob: Are you trying to confuse them with your words? Mark: Maybe *Giggles* Bob: Yes *Mixed noises* Bob: I’m not- I’m not a barrel either I was just trying to make fun of Mark
    Mark: Thank you Bob: Nailed it *creepy laugh* Mark: *imitates same laugh* Jack: Are they in here Mark:*imitates laugh again* Jack: GRAB EVERYTHING HUUGH Bob: My name is Cornholio (?) Wade: *garbled* They opened the garbage up, opened up the garbage. Wade: They are- *garbled up* Jack: Did you just shoot that? Bob: Here, I’ll- I’ll jump for you. Wade: What is that?! Bob: Everytime I say- everytime I- Still Bob: Say “Boing” I’ll jump, how ’bout that? Wade: I- I like picked it up. Bob: Boing! A-Boing! Still Bob: A-Boing, A-Boing, *pause* A-Boing! Mark: This Jack: Okay, you’re not above water then. Bob: A-Boing *long pause* Bob: Guess I’m definitely not above water Jack: Hmm Wade: Are one of you the- Bob: A-BOING! *Mark and Bob laugh* *still laughing* xD Bob: Wait-Wawawawait, ready- ready? Do it. *laughs* *OMGITHAPPENED!!* Bob: YES!! Yes! *Loud laughs from Bob and Mark* Jack: What happened?!? *Laughter continues* Mark: Oh- oh, it feels like home! 😀 Bob: We-we-we’ve rekindled our winning ways! *Mark laughs* Wade: Jack, I know what they are.. *JACKNO* Mark: AWW *Everyone laughs* Jack: Just like ol’ times! Mark: Oh man, Oh memories.. Mark: Oh delicious memories Bob: It worked so much better last time. Mark: Yeaah.. Wade: Well.. Wade: yeah.. Mark: I- I think it was just maybe, a little- Still Mark: They were on the hunt for it. They- they were ready for our moves. Bob: Ooo man, I can’t believe- I can’t believe we finally came back together Mark. Mark: Yeah it’s been ages- years.. Jack: I can’t belive he finally came Mark: Yeah.. I-I take awhile ya know? Bob: It’s like you’ve been all the way inside me, and I kind of liked it. Mark: I’m an endurance man is the way it is
    Bob: Mm. Bob: Gross
    Mark: Thanks. Jack: Hehe *imitates Bob* Mm.
    Wade: *laughs* Jack: That’s not nice.
    Everyone: *laughs* Mark: Huh, that’s- that’s aw- literally awful.
    Bob: I was just making a joke, but that sounds awful. Mark: Yeah. *disgusted noise* Jus- Just don’t talk again, man. Mm. Jack: JUN JUN JUN JUN JUN JUN JUN JUN JUN JUN JUN JUN JUN~ Mark: Alright. Whoooo’s around here?
    Bob: Choy choy choy choy choy choy choy? Mark: Oh, by the way.
    Bob: What’s that sound? Mark: By the way, Bob, you have, like, mines. So. I’m gonna place a mind at a choke point.
    Bob: I have mines? Mark: You have a mine.
    Bob: Oh, yes. Yes I do. Jack: Place mines. Don’t be douchebags.
    Mark: I’m gonna place a mine at a choke point so if they go by it…
    Wade: Oops. Your choke point just went into the water.
    Jack: *laughs* *Bob joins* Mark: *laughs*
    Jack: *imitates Mark* You have to go by it. Boop.
    Bob: Jack did you- did you see that, Jack? Bob: Did you see that? Jack: Yeah, it fell nowhere near me. *laughs* Bob: What was that?
    Mark: Okay… Jack: I heard it a sploosh.
    Wade: Saw that. Hey. Stop that. Stop shooting. Bob: You heard a sploosh?
    Jack: No. Do- don’t come in here. *laughs* Mark: Wait where?
    Wade: Yeah, you get out of there!
    Bob: Un- unlikely story Mark: Where are they at, Bob?
    Wade: Bob doesn’t trust me.
    Bob: Why aren’t you moving, fish? Wade: Bob doesn’t trust me. Mark: What’s going on, Bob? What’s the story, Bob?
    Bob: Uh, I’m just doing some recon. I-I feel like I accidentally threw my mine right at one of them And then Jack was all like *imitates Jack* Uuh… Noo… Wade: *laughs*
    Mark: Hang on a second, here. Bob: *still imitating Jack* Nowhere near me Mark: Hang on a second. Wait. Hang on a second.
    Bob: What? Mark: Something- something- something ain’t right here.
    Jack: Uh-oh. Wade. Wade. Mark: Something ain’t right with this fish Jack: Wade.
    Bob: *laughs* Mark: Ehh. *realizes* Oh.
    Jack: W-wade, I’m stuck… Wade: Here, here, here.
    Mark: I guess it’s fine! That fish was just being really weird! Never mind, then. Jack: Thank you. Oh, God. *relieved grunt*
    Wade: Your welcome.
    *Both laugh* Mark: Okay, what’s going on? Jack: Doo doo doo doo~
    Wade: Nothing! Nothing at all happened!
    Mark: What’s going on over there? Bob: *laughs*
    Jack: Nothing at all!
    Mark: What’s going on, guys? Wade: There was not a prop delivery service. Mark: What’s going o- *laughs*
    Jack: *chuckles* Bob: The sounds in this game are freaking me out. Jack: Is that the update? Ja dun~
    Bob: I guess. Wade: Uh-oh, it’s my theme song. Mark: Uh, wai- ah, d- ah, the- there’s something going on here. Something’s f*cky! Mark: There we go!
    Jack: Ahh!
    Everyone: *laughs* Jack: I didn’t know you were there!
    Mark: *yeah that morphs into more laughing* Mark: There’s just a mysterious file box moving around! Hmm.
    Jack: I didn’t see you. Mark: Okay, so, Bob, that means Wade’s down here somewhere cuz.
    Bob: Alright. Mark: Cuz if Jack was helping him…
    Jack: Cuz it wasn’t twenty seconds ago when that happened. Wade and Mark: Yeah
    Bob: Yeah, no, it’s fine.
    Jack: I-I wa- I was a plant on the surface when I got stuck and I couldn’t change. So Wade brought me a fish.
    Mark: Uh, sure! Yeah, that’s what you want us to think! a- and then you make a fool of us!
    Bob: Uh-huh
    Jack: It’s the truth. Jack: Watch it back.
    Bob: That’s- that’s what you want us too think. Bob: That’s what you had said.
    Mark: Wait. Hang on.
    Wade: That’s. Mark: SURPRISE!!
    Wade: What. They want us to- Bob: Woah, j- What?
    Jack: How’re you guys breathing underwater?! Mark: Okay.
    Jack: Those are not water filtration…
    Bob: F*cking- f*cking magic. Mark: I th- huh
    Bob: How do you- what do you care? Wade: There’s been some explosion up-
    Bob: How do you breathe?
    Jack: F*-cking ma-gic.
    Mark: Hehe. Heh. I wanted to catch someone up there, but it didn’t work.
    Bob: F*cking. Magic, Jack. Bob: F*cking magic.
    Jack: You can do it, Wade. I believe in you. Mark: Where you at, Wade? Wait a minute. Haang on a second.
    Wade: I got this. I got this like the Silver Surfer got- uh, Spiderman. Bob: I really just don’t- I really just don’t- I don’t feel I’m doing that well today at the prop hunting.
    Mark: Wait a minute. Wait a minute. Jack: *chuckles* Mark: No. Not that. Bob: Mark, are you just shooting at sh*t?
    Jack: No.
    Mark: I- there’s a cone. A cone has been displaced over here. Bob: I’ve found him.
    Wade: Woohoo!
    Jack: *laughs*
    Mark: What? Where? Where? Mark: Where? Where is he? Whup! Caught a sight of him. WAHH! Bob: What the sh*t?
    Wade: *laughs* *Mark and Bob join in*
    Jack: *questions his friendship with Mark* Jack: Did you kill yourself?
    Bob: where the f*ck did he just go?
    Wade: Bombs away. Mark: Uh- I don’t know.
    Jack: *imitating Mark* I caught sight of him! He’s over there! *death* Bob: Yeah, Mark, calm down, man!
    Mark: *giggles* I threw a grenade-
    Jack: His f*cking lifeless dead body over there. Mark: N-no! My- my reticle passed by him. I saw his name pop up, so I’m like, “Oh! If I just throw a grenade in this general direction I might get him!” NOOOPE! Jack: Cuz that’s how it works. *laughs* Bob: What’s up, Wade?
    Wade : Hey Bob! Mark: Oh, he’s- he’s up top. Bob, he’s- he’s up top. Bob: I lost him again. Oh, wait. Wait. Wade, wait! Wait! Wait! Wade! Wade, wait! Jack: Yeah. Wade, wait.
    Bob: There’s only four that’s all that’s left. Bob: Wade wait! I’ve used them both.
    Wade: I feel like you’ve got a bomb left. I don’t wanna wait too much.
    Jack: Wait, Wade. Wait Wade.
    Mark: Wade, come on. *boom*
    Wade: WOOHOO!
    Mark and Jack: *laugh* Wade: I knew it! Mark: Yeah. We’re- after so many years, we’re starting to not trust Bob. It’s amaazing.
    Wade: Yeah, I know!
    Jack: Yeah. We got it now. We got it. Bob: I- I- I give up. Can I go back over here? Bob: Nah.
    Jack: Bob. Don’t give up. Jack: You can do it. Bob: I can’t fucking shoot the tiny fish. I’m not gonna just run around and look like an asshole. Mark: Bob, Bob, Bob… *Jack laughs* Bob: I’m not gonna do it. I’m not gonna do it. Bob: I’m going out on my own terms. Mark: *laughs* Bob: I’m not gonna do it Wade: I’ll go say hi to Mother Shark c: Bob: I can’t shoot that little fish like that Bob: I’m not good enough. I’m not gonna do it. Bob: I’m not gonna play that game.
    Mark: That’s..
    Wade: Oh. Jack: You mean the ACTUAL game of Prop Hunt?
    Mark: Yeah. Mark: And now because of this… Mark: And now because of this…
    Jack: You’re not… you’re not allowed to be a tiny fish, Bob. Jack: You’re not… you’re not allowed to be a tiny fish, Bob. Bob: I wasn’t! If you’ll remember. Mark: *giggles*
    Bob: I’m never a fucking tiny fish. Bob: I’m always a stupid barrel who dies really fast! :c Wade: All right, Bob’s a barrel. Jack: We’ll see. Jack: That means he’s a fish! Don’t trust Bob.
    Wade: *laughs* Bob: Absolutely. I’m a fish.
    Mark: Aww.. this was a…. Mark: This was a bad idea. Wade: What if they decided to go for the obvious and be a fish IN a barrel?! *insert X-Files theme here* Bob: That would be too much.
    Jack: IT’S TOO BRILLIANT. Wade: Yeah. I agree. They’re not smart enough. Jack: Way too brilliant for THOSE guys. Mark: Oh, damn it..
    Jack: The fuck are these sounds? Stop it. Bob: Ohh… oh dear… oh gosh.. I ruined it.
    Wade: They’re opening the gate. Mark: No- No we’re not. You don’t know that. Jack: I got ammers. (ammo?) Wade: I got yelled at for opening it two rounds ago.
    (Jack: Woo! :D) Bob: You guys don’t know what we’re doin’.
    Jack: This chair moved. Bob: You guys don’t know.
    Jack: Who moved this chair?! Wade: Ah, this gate’s closed. Wade: I wonder what happened..
    Bob: Wish I could.. wish I could see what’s going on in here.
    Mark: Nothing happened! Bob: Can’t see shit.
    Jack: Yeah, in some of the areas you go to, Jack: You can’t see through the walls. Bob: I know! You can’t see shit. Mark: Ah… Bob: I basically won’t know anything until I’m dead. If I die. Wade: That’s a real catfish alright. Jack: Here’s a plant knocked over.
    Mark: *nervous* What are you talking about? What are you talking about? Jack: My detective senses are tingling. Mark: What are you talking about? Bob: I don’t think… THAT’S the sense that’s tingling, Jack…
    ( ͡° ͜ʖ ͡°) Jack: My detective senses!
    Bob: We all know… Wade: Put it away, Jack. ( ͡° ͜ʖ ͡°)
    Bob: We all know how you feel about plants. ( ͡° ͜ʖ ͡°)
    Jack: My detective juices! Mark: Oh jeez not the jucies! Bob: That’s not how it works… Mark: Why is everything juicy with you? It doesn’t need to be juicy. Jack: But i like juicy fruits! I’m shocked yeah I’m more than shocked
    like me yeah cocked and ready I don’t kind of
    want to ruin your fun jack you know you seem like you’re probably having a good
    time I’m having a good time in a great spot I’m not moving Oh Jack you are in a great spot hey Jack
    right you’re lucky I can’t yeah okay what mark what are you talking about that Oh
    didn’t I tell you what the hell wait it might have not even here what’s
    happening right now hey where is he he’s he was down here I
    saw his name pop up I just didn’t I couldn’t get a lock on
    what item he was jackin this office might be the greatest when might be
    received we see what happens mark is really don’t i am incredibly stupid so I
    pulled the old with shark technique yeah we really got Wishart what the hell
    was that people are going to use that I don’t know what’s happening right now
    are you what the fuck I didn’t have a lot of it
    is working what is going on haha and did you run
    away in I didn’t notice it may be because look
    really bad mark no he’s still here now oh wow well one of you what how did you survive
    i know you were still there where ya haha oh it looks better that way and uh huh what I said you could you
    survive the grenade he can do I have no idea what the dance was a little wiener yeah he was a little wiener it may not
    have been a matter of the whole time but how did you survive I got beat the curtain to the right at
    the table but that’s it Ellen’s Oh Bob interest Ellen’s Bob huh Cooper did you Bob haha was it over there five seconds ago
    I was just looking over there he was right behind your head I had zero
    kills that you can read if it’s i was i was there i was the cabbage on the table
    and you like dropped a grenade right in front of my face I know what the hell that’s a tough cabbage yeah like your I was scanning every item
    in your name wasn’t popping up it was so weird. Jack: You like walked right by with the gun on my ass. Mark: I know [top and bottom videos: laughter and various screaming but also some gibberish] [music fades]

    GAME MASTER CHALLENGE! Sinking Box Fort Prison Escape (Project Zorgo Hacked)
    Articles, Blog

    GAME MASTER CHALLENGE! Sinking Box Fort Prison Escape (Project Zorgo Hacked)

    November 13, 2019


    they really explain what’s going on right now to make sure you hit the subscribe button and the power button where am I what’s going on where is this place it’s a GoPro what’s going on hello was I was they filming a video Logan did I pass out in a box for what wait wait no no they buzz chasing the gamemaster no no no no no no no she must have got me again you must’ve captured me what’s going on why is their camera hello can you hear me Logan are you here hello I’m cooking the chains he’s got me all chained up the door what yeah welcome to my box for prison escape balloon replay game since you’re so inclined to escape from prisons you could try to escape from my box for prison that’s giving you a GoPro to film everything this this isn’t a prison this is just cardboard look I’m I’m getting out of here I don’t care what do you mean not following my rules we’ll leave you with a shocking surprise if I break out if you follow my rules or else what if we pick out of here without using what kind of game is this the game is simple escape the prison using my rules before the time runs out you can escape by finding a final key and pressing the red button above you have 30 minutes the box was slowly filling with water water good luck what do you mean water buddy what do you be where am I went what are you gonna do with the water I don’t know I don’t know who’s gonna be seeing this I don’t know who’s maybe watching this footage this is you guys I’m in a lot of trouble right now it looks like the game master wants me to escape following his rules if I try and break out of this in any other way well he’s gonna eliminate me and worst of all if I don’t get out of here in the amount of time that he’s given me this thing’s gonna fill up with water and if I’m in these chains there’s no way I’m surviving all right Hey look I just gotta gonna think it’s gonna take like the game master with he’s gonna play his game he he must have set this up like a puzzle he does everything like a puzzle this isn’t like a box for a prison escape these in here have to make sense but also be a trick it’s gotta be something in here looks like this is all just random stuff on the wall if anything will touch anything box punched what do you mean don’t touch and how do I know what to touch it when not to touch you I gotta get these chains off and quick maybe there’s something in here looks like there’s some sort of funny beaker with some red substance inside of it hey rocky there’s some sort and weight depending who the waters are you trip we’ve got a rocket of some sort maybe a test tube for it I’m paying now has this this has gotta be UV light UV like that it uses UV light to find clues okay first I gotta get out of these cuffs well if the gamemaster set this up like a game it means he wants me to escape maybe maybe this is part of it maybe maybe he wants me to film it this is why would he give me a GoPro why would he give me access to you guys she wants me to film it he he wants me to escape he wants to put me through a game that’s why he’s the game master Oh keep it look if I don’t if I don’t play his game and I don’t escape then this will be the last video I ever make so I just gotta do it I’m gonna figure out a way out of here and I I can do this okay Papa Jake can do this I’ll end the game master be the end of me look I found this inside the chest he gave me I think I might be able to use it to open up these cuffs I’m not sure exactly what he wanted me to use it for but heck if I’m playing this game I’m bending the rules a little bit all right here we go I’m just gonna put it in here and I should be able to bend the metal enough to turn it into a makeshift key just like so and I got it I got the first cuff perfect okay all right now our objective is to open up this timer and click the button here to stop no more water this isn’t good guys there’s more water getting in here I thought the game master says is true this place is gonna be filled with water before I okay okay we’ve got to find a key to open up this timer and click the button to stop it that will end the game now if he’s hitting a key in here it’s gotta be somewhere we’re water more water more water no no no no no no I can’t plug it okay she’s gonna hide a key it’s gotta be somewhere in here maybe behind one of these walls maybe gonna be somewhere secret okay your seat can be received by pressing one of the buttons press the wrong one and the game boy the buttons through the buttons okay all right if I press the wrong button I get eliminated if I press the right button I get the key okay it’s going to work backwards and fast how do I know which button to press maybe maybe maybe there’s a clue me maybe there’s something with the UV light wouldn’t be that simple all right hold on let me get this last cup off and then we can figure it out come on got it all right cuffs are off now all I need to do is get rid of this chain if water starts pouring in here and fast this is just gonna sink me gotta find a way to open this looks like it’s a combination lock there’s got to be a clue in here some sort of combination maybe the UV light they can use this now if using the UV light combination would be written but I see something here No way oh no this isn’t good what kind of clues are these I can’t panic can’t panic all right there’s got to be something in here I don’t know enough time gotta find the combination if he’s giving me this UV light it’s gotta be with this it’s gotta be somewhere on the walls here was this mean boom feels like this is hollow but I don’t want to break through it he already told me if I touch too many things he will illuminate me okay let’s try and find this combination there’s got to be another clue on here somewhere somewhere maybe on the roof this side of the wall here something something nothing on the door wait here good guys we gotta hurry up come on what’s this a legit clue play something here subscribe no no no these are all these riddles numbers somewhere here this isn’t good this is a good can’t plug it wait wait here numbers one one eight six that’s got to be the combination there’s no way you’d give me the number of the button right now this has to be the combination and if I press the right button here that could be the worst thing I could do okay let’s try this huh one one eight six one one eight six got it the cheese off click on the channel police now if this place fills up the water I can swim a little bit much can be dragged down by this chain alright next step let’s find our way out of here there’s gotta be another clue in here oh no no more water come on tell me something what do you want me to do the answer from escaping can be behind your great what would I buy the boom behind the broom okay okay I gotta get behind the boom I’ll just punch it can i plunge it usually Walker Oracle’s use the rocket I thought you were an expert of escaping persons look yeah I’ve done prison escapes before but never something like this he wants me to get through the boom using this rocket he’s gotta think he’s the game master he’s putting things for my own videos in here what have i used before like a rocket and a prison escape wait that’s it baking soda and vinegar rockets that that must agree with the test tube was for hold on here it is okay looks like we have some sort of baking soda in here now only would need is vinegar and then I could set this rocket off and blast it through the boom like that through the boom I could get to the next step but I’ve got to set off a baking soda and vinegar rocket which means no no no I need to find some vinegar and fast something in here well are you starting to pull up here guys this isn’t good there’s a lot of water in here come on give me more time have fun vinegar vinegar vinegar where would it be I can’t go in the boom without using the rocket just catch something just gotta be something wait what’s this there’s some sort of substance in here guys wait guys guys check this out there’s no water in here that’s going to be the vinegar there’s got to be vinegar running through this tube look if I shine this on water it does nothing but inside this tube it lights up like crazy there’s supposed to be where he’s hiding the vinegar I need something to cut this way I know how this game has to be played he’s gotta follow his rules and do what he wants but that means solving his mysteries we’ve got to figure out a way to set off this baking soda and vinegar rocket I know I need vinegar to do that but the problem is the vinegar is inside this tube once I set off the rocket I can get behind this boom and maybe then I’ll figure out what the number is so I can escape using a key but if I press the wrong number then I go boom all right the only thing is we need something to cut this with I need some more clues in here I barely search the entire place here nothing here maybe something on the ground or the ceiling come on wait wait guys there’s an arrow there’s an arrow pointing towards this box here that must mean I’m allowed to open it okay all right if he’s pointing at it another arrow here okay if he’s putting out it with arrows it means that should be able to open it come on see what’s behind this thing oh no more water come on come on I was right there’s something behind here what is this some sort of song device but wait it’s missing a battery no no no no why is everything a riddle I might be able to use this device to open up this tube but this is missing a battery just gonna find myself a battery Jake who’s that hello okay Louise listen closely

    Fish Story
    Articles, Blog

    Fish Story

    November 11, 2019


    I can’t even imagine how many times
    I’ve made you tell this story now. That you’ve made me tell the story, I think … … five, certainly, that I can remember. I’m saying ‘tell the story’
    like I’m some kind of raconteur. – How does it come up?
    – So it came, it came up … How does it come up
    when I don’t bring it up? It comes up because I’m discussing
    my stupid name, Caspar Salmon. Once from the top. In the past, in I think 1986 or 1987 possibly 1988 In the 80s, when I was a child my grandmother was invited to
    attend the opening of some kind of sea … … thing. Sea thing? Yeah, well I couldn’t remember
    what it was, d’you see? Cos I was a kid, I couldn’t think
    what thing she’d been to. And then I subsequently had it
    confirmed to me. It was the Anglesey Marina. So she attended the opening
    of the Anglesey Marina and she attended it in the company of other people from the area in North Wales,
    where she lives, who also happened to have fish surnames because my grandmother’s called
    Pauline Salmon. So there would’ve been a Mr. … You know, Mr. and Mrs. Crab, or … Carp Cos this is a key point as well, actually,
    that I’ve not really scrutinised. How many fish surnames are there? – Cos, for instance, you’ve listed two.
    – Yeah. And I’ve never heard of a Carp. Jenny Carp. There are loads of others. Think of more fish, there are them. – Like …
    – Anchovie. Uhh … Pollock. Jackson Pollock. – Okay.
    – Fucking eat it. – Cod.
    – Yeah. Okay, no one’s called Cod. So they get there … They get there, and everybody who is there including the Crabs and the Herrings
    and everybody else receives … uhh … A copy … I keep saying a copy,
    what’s the word for … They receive their own surname as a fish as a present. So the people who are called Salmon
    receive a salmon and the Herrings receive I suppose more than one herring
    cos a herring is a smaller fish. But you got a version of your name so my grandmother received a salmon
    and she was able to take it home and cook it and it was given to her by Sir Michael Fish the weather presenter from the BBC who was there to open the marina officially,
    so he was the person … and he was there
    giving out the fish to everyone. What point in Michael Fish’s career is this? Sir Michael Fish of the BBC. Well, I think this is … This is the thing I’m not sure about cos he had the nadir of his career when he
    failed to predict a hurricane I think maybe. Good afternoon to you. Earlier on today apparently a woman rung
    the BBC and said she heard that there was a hurricane on the way. Well, if you’re watching,
    don’t worry, there isn’t. I think that was in 1988 or something
    and if I’m correct then … In 1986 he’d have been at the height
    of his powers, and fame. And wonderfully he fit the theme perfectly,
    because he was famous and … … his name is Fish, and
    the theme was fish. Your call cannot be taken at the moment,
    so please your message after the tone. Hi, I’m looking for Mr. Bass It’s about the opening of a marina in the 1980s
    that I’m hoping he might know something about Is that Mrs. Crab? It is. I’m looking into the opening of a marina
    in the late 1980s. I don’t suppose that rings any bells? Where was the marina?
    What town was it in? On Anglesey somewhere. There are lots of places on Anglesey. The reason I ask is that apparently
    the organisers filled the opening with people from the area who
    had fish-related names. You’ve been trawling through
    the directory, have you? More or less. Please leave a message after the tone. Hello, I’m hoping to reach the Mullet family regarding the opening of a marina. Hello, is that Mrs. Haddock? Yes. Is that Ms. Pike? Yes. Is that Mr. Plaice? Hello. … fish-related surnames, like yourself. I think we went there, perhaps,
    when the kids were little but I don’t think we got invited there,
    you know, with a fish-related name. Hello? Is that Mr. Whiting? It is, yeah. … to get as many people there as possible
    with fish-related surnames. That’s a new one on me. Hello? Hi, is that Mrs. Turbot? Yes. I’m calling about the opening
    of a marina in Anglesey I don’t know anything about it. – The reason I ask is …
    – Okay, thank you, goodbye. Maybe it was because of the
    time I called, or just because young people don’t
    really have landlines any more … Right. … but most people were in the right
    sort of age bracket to have been around at the time … Okay. … and the most common response was
    one of amused bafflement. But so, perhaps it’s a lie. Well, so I also reached out to
    Michael Fish’s agent and let me read you the response I got back. Oh god, this is a nightmare. Hi Charlie, I’m afraid that this
    isn’t for Michael as first and foremost he doesn’t
    remember opening a marina in Anglesey so possibly you don’t have the correct person. Best, Nick Oh my god. But there are a lot of fish people in
    this phonebook, so I figured I’d keep trying. 449? Ooh, hello. Is that Mrs. Herring? Yep. I’m calling cos I’m looking into
    the opening of a marina, in Anglesey and the reason I’m phoning you is cos
    for the opening, the organisers invited people from the local area, from North Wales,
    who had fish-related surnames. As far as I’m aware, this was
    some point in the late 1980s … 1980s? No, we didn’t come here til ’88. The only thing we’ve done is …
    we went to a thing at, um … Anglesey Sea Zoo with Michael Fish. You are kidding. Yes, yes. So it wasn’t a marina then, it was a … It was at the Sea Zoo,
    at Anglesey, on Anglesey. Sea Zoo? Is that like an aquarium? Yeah yeah yeah, big aquarium. I don’t suppose, while you were there,
    you were given anything? Um, hang on, me husband’s here,
    he might remember a bit more, hang on. Love? What was we given? We was given two of our fish,
    weren’t we? We was given herrings, weren’t we? On a white tray. Oh my god, this is brilliant. So it was a bit vague, but she was
    very specific about where it was which was this Anglesey Sea Zoo which is an aquarium. – Okay.
    – Not quite sure why they’ve called it a Sea Zoo. As though the word aquarium didn’t come
    to mind when they were doing the naming. So three weeks from now, on May 27th,
    I’m going up to Anglesey – No!
    – On the 8am train, via Chester. Yes. – Have you done that route?
    – A million times. What should I look out for? There’s nothing there, absolutely nothing. There’s nothing to do. Go to Anglesey, and just look at the sea,
    and go and see … … the lighthouse, that’s nice and then get the hell out. Oh no, and go and see the bridge as well. Thingy did a bridge there,
    Isambard Kingdom Brunel. Very nice bridge. Actually I’ve been an arsehole,
    Anglesey is lovely. I’m thinking of Colwyn Bay which is just awful. I honestly can’t tell you how
    excited I am to be here. Maybe we could start by talking
    about what makes the Sea Zoo special? I love talking about what makes
    the Sea Zoo special, that’s why I’m here. We are completely unique because
    we have only native species, all British species. Our water comes from the Menai Strait,
    which is right on our doorstep so all our systems are natural systems,
    they’re sustainable systems. The seasonality, the temperatures,
    everything is the same as the sea around Wales. It’s amazing how many people in Britain know
    absolutely nothing about what’s in the sea in Britain. I love that aspect to it, I love the fact
    that we get adults, teachers, even OAPs coming here, who say,
    ‘my god, I never knew that, that’s amazing.’ You know, they learn something, they learn
    something new when they come and visit. And how long have you been here? I bought it myself nine years ago. It was launched by four partners I believe,
    or maybe three originally and then two of the partners
    were a couple They sold the business to me so they actually branched out to
    do Halen Mon Sea Salt next door so they are still using the water
    from the Menai Strait but they’re using it to make salt now. So you two opened the Anglesey Sea Zoo. You’re the de facto heroes of the entire film. Bit scary, isn’t it? First off, why don’t you tell me whether
    the whole thing is actually true? – It is true.
    – Absolutely. It was a pivotal moment of the Sea Zoo. It was really important cos we’d invested
    everything we had in the Sea Zoo and we’re on a remote island. At that time it was pre-Internet, pre-email and we wanted to tell people about it but we had no budget to do it but as soon as we floated the idea
    we produced a press release – Floated, see what you did there.
    – Yep. ‘Calling Mr. Piranha,’ it said ‘Officials doubt whether they’ll find
    a Mr. Piranha to invite …’ ‘… but there are plenty of other
    fishy names in the phone book.’ But we had to get herring, carp,
    spratling, pike, haddock, winkle, cockles And jelly. We had to make them
    a jelly in the end, didn’t we? The Jelly family came from Mold
    and they were some of the winners We did relax the rules for the Jellys because
    they came from Mold, we just couldn’t resist that one and they were very nice, weren’t they?
    They were very pleased. And we were in everything we were on the BBC World Service
    and we were in The Sun It seemed to be like a good news story
    and it worked beyond our wildest dreams, really. ‘Michael’s a star catch’ and
    ‘Top Fish is put in his plaice’ Every subeditor produced every
    corny thing they could come up with. – And now you’re over here making salt?
    – Yep. What did you do when you opened this place? We bought a birthday cake in
    the shape of the building. Hard to beat Michael Fish isn’t it? If there was a weatherman called Mr. Salt … Yeah, who could you get?
    You’d have to get, uh … You could get Salt from Salt & Pepa. Oh, great! So I’ve brought you back
    a gift from Anglesey Oh my goodness! This is amazing! So that is Michael Fish,
    at the opening of the Anglesey Sea Zoo and not only a salmon, but the salmon
    that was given to your grandmother That’s impossible! That’s ridiculous. Oh, I’m gonna cry. I’m not gonna cry. ♫ Rock music plays ♫ I have no recollection whatsoever
    of opening an aquarium in Anglesey cos I’ve opened so many aquariums
    that they all blend into one, as it were No, I never regretted having the name. Thinking back, it was probably an asset
    rather than anything else. It seems like it’s got you a fair bit of work? I had a song all about me as well. ♫ I wish, I wish ♫ ♫ He was like Michael Fish ♫ ‘Cute and cuddly and quite a dish’ When was this? That was about twenty years ago now,
    I’m not cute and cuddly any more.

    When Your Catfish Is Actually a Fish (w/ Sally Hawkins)
    Articles, Blog

    When Your Catfish Is Actually a Fish (w/ Sally Hawkins)

    November 10, 2019


    >>EXCUSE ME. RACHEL. RACHEL? IT’S ME, TERRIE. FROM TINDER. WE HAVE BEEN TEXTING. WE MATCHED.>>TERRIE FROM MICHIGAN.>>MICHIGAN. LONDON.>>HI.>>HOW ARE YOU?>>UMMM … WHICH — WHICH PART OF MICHIGAN
    ARE YOU FROM?>>THE LAKE. YA, YOU KNOW — THE LAKE.>>I’M SORRY. YOU LOOK NOTHING LIKE YOUR
    PROFILE PICTURE.>>OH, YOU THOUGHT I WAS — NO. NO. YOU SEE, SEE THAT’S ME. IN THE TANK. IN THE TANK BEHIND HIM. YOU SEE.>>RIGHT. I DIDN’T SEE, I’M A LITTLE
    CONFUSED.>>COME ON WHO IS COMPLETELY
    HONEST ON THE TINDER PROFILES. YOUR HAIR WAS LONGER IN YOUR
    PHOTO.>>I HAD A HAIRCUT.>>HAD YOU A HAIRCUT I’M A FISH
    MAN.>>OH.>>NICE YOU PUT YOUR NAPKIN ON
    YOUR LAP. BETTER THAN MOST OF THE DATES I
    GO ON, NO NECK TATTOO. DO YOU WANT TO SHARE AN
    APPETIZER OR SOMETHING?>>WOW. OKAY, SERIOUSLY?>>YA.>>IF I’M HONEST THIS IS LONGER
    THEN ANY TINDER DATE I HAVE BEEN ON. PEOPLE NORMALLY SEE ME AND LEAVE
    BECAUSE I’M A SEA MONSTER.>>HI, THERE. CAN I GET YOU TWO STARTED WITH
    ANYTHING?>>IF I HAVE WINE WILL YOU HAVE
    A GLASS OF WINE.>>I WILL HAVE A GLASS OF WINE. TWO GLASSES OF YOUR FINEST RED
    WINE. THANK YOU. I HAVE A QUESTION, ACTUALLY. WHAT, WHAT IS THE SOUP DE JOUR?>>I THINK THAT MEANS SOUP OF
    THE DAY. [LAUGHING]
    [LAUGHING]>>CLAM CHOWDER.>>OH, NO, NO, NO. CLAMS DON’T LIKE ME. I DON’T LIKE THEM.>>CHEESE BURGER, PLEASE.>>I WILL HAVE —
    >>EXCELLENT CHOICES.>>THIRSTY.>>DID YOU DRIVE HERE.>>I TOOK AN UBER.>>ME TOO. MY DRIVER WOULDN’T STOP TALKING.>>SAME HERE. SO OBNOXIOUS.>>YES.>>I KEEP THINKING THEY SHOULD
    HAVE A UBER SILENT MODE. PAY DOUBLE EVERY TIME.>>I HAVE TO SAY UBER POOL. OH, OH MY GOD.>>IT’S OKAY.>>I SNORTED WHEN I LAUGHED. THAT’S NEVER HAPPENED TO ME
    BEFORE.>>USUALLY MEN WAIT UNTIL AFTER
    DINNER TO SAY THAT.>>I DID IT. (SNORTING)
    [LAUGHING]>>IT’S FUN.>>IT IS FUN.>>HERE YOU GO.>>THANK YOU, SO MUCH.>>AND YOUR SEAWEED SALAD.>>THANK YOU. MONSIEUR. FRENCH.>>OH YES.>>CHECK THIS OUT. WHAT AM I? WHAT AM I?>>YOU’RE STEALING MY DINNER.>>NO, FISH AND CHIPS. I’M FISH. THESE ARE THE CHIPS. [LAUGHING]
    >>I’M SO SORRY.>>IT’S OKAY.>>I HAVE RUINED YOUR FRIES. I’M SO SORRY.>>IT’S ALRIGHT. THEY’RE BAD FOR YOU ANYWAYS. I’M WATCHING MY FIGURE.>>WATCHING YOUR FIGURE. LEAVE THAT TO ME. [LAUGHING]
    >>SO SILLY. APPARENTLY I LIKE SILLY.>>NICE.>>SO, SORRY WHAT IS GOING ON? WHAT IS GOING ON THERE?>>I’M JUST EATING MY CHEESE
    BURGER.>>WITH A KNIFE AND FORK.>>WHAT’S WRONG WITH THAT.>>NOTHING. IT’S WEIRD, THAT’S ALL. IT’S A CHEESE BURGER.>>YES.>>DON’T USE A KNIFE AND FORK. YOU PICK UP AND EAT IT WITH YOUR
    HANDS. THAT’S WHAT NORMAL PEOPLE DO.>>NORMAL PEOPLE?>>WHAT’S THAT SUPPOSE TO MEAN? YOU THINK BECAUSE I’M A FISH MAN
    I DON’T KNOW WHAT A NORMAL PERSON IS. YOU KNOW WHAT, I SHOULD OF
    KNOWN. YOU’RE JUST — YOU’RE JUST LIKE
    ALL OF THE REST OF THEM. THIS ISN’T GOING TO WORK.>>THIS IS RICH. YOU’RE REJECTING ME. YOU’RE NOT EVEN WEARING ANY
    PANTS.>>IT’S BETTER THAN WHAT YOU GOT
    ON. I LIVE IN THE BOTTOM OF THE
    OCEAN, WHAT’S YOUR EXCUSE.>>WELL, JOKE’S ON YOU. WHERE I COME FROM THAT’S A KISS
    ON THE CHEEK.

    Crazy Fishing Routine
    Articles, Blog

    Crazy Fishing Routine

    November 10, 2019


    fish and indoors are fishing indoors
    skipping my chores cause of fishing indoors Oh if a little nibble I wonder
    what I’ll catch you can’t be serious is this really what it looks like why
    yes I’m fishing indoors didn’t you hear my song why are you doing this Addie
    well I really like fishing right this is the first I’m hearing that well one of
    the things I don’t like about fishing is all the bugs so I thought why not fish
    indoors oh I don’t know maybe because you can’t catch fish indoors have you
    ever really tried though Jillian I don’t have to try to know that you can’t fish
    indoors you might as well try to hunt turkey indoors
    don’t be silly Jillian turkey hunting season isn’t until later this year I
    don’t even know why I care so much about this you’re the one who’s wasting your
    time am i though Jillian ooh I got a bite oh sure you did I think I hooked
    him let’s reel it in look Jillian I caught a largemouth bass
    how the heck did you do that see I knew fishing indoors would pay off wait a
    minute what are you using as bait anyway Oh a bag of money you’re using a bag of
    money to catch fish aren’t you supposed to use worms and hooks and stuff
    worms are gross hooks scare me and let’s face it who doesn’t want money Addie I’m
    pretty sure you’re just playing a joke on me fine more fish for me ain’t it a
    beauty anyone can catch one fish indoors let’s see you catch another fine what
    are you gonna do with the fish anyway oh I wink wink I’m gonna give them a
    nice home wink wink oh so you’re gonna eat the fish Shh they
    can hear you fish don’t have ears and anyway I’m pretty sure they don’t
    understand English I’m not willing to take that chance ooh I got another bite
    I don’t know how you’re doing that addy a good fisherman or fisher girl in this
    case never tells other people who are Secrets
    ooh and it looks like we have another fish whoo this one’s either a perch or a rock
    bass I’m not sure that distinction even matters when it comes to indoor fishing
    so to fish plenty more before I hit my limit I’ll
    admit Addie I was skeptical at first but now I want to give it a try
    well did you bring your indoor fishing rod coz this is the only one I have
    oh um I left it at school yeah you had indoor fishing at school oh yeah we had
    an indoor fishing derby jealous very I guess I could lend you my rod since you
    are a fellow indoor fisher girl right oh yeah totally
    which end do I hold again the handle I was just testing you whoo that’s a good spot I think there’s
    fish hiding in that closet how do these indoor fish survive without water they
    survive on the beliefs of naive children hmm I figured it was something like that
    I did feel something nibble try to hook it and how would I do that
    give it a pull and start reeling it in got it it feels like a big one doesn’t seem to
    be fighting much maybe it’s a lazy old catfish whoa look at that beautiful
    brown fish Jillian that’s a boot howdy everyone knows boots are made from fish
    I’m pretty sure they’re made from ostrich you have another bite Jillian
    huh oh yeah what the hello how would you do that giant I don’t know what should I
    do whenever I get a fish I don’t when I
    throw it back you go back to where you came from okey-dokey uh uh put the money
    down oh I think it’s my turn Jillian I know it’s a little late for this
    question but do we need a license for this hey if you won’t tell I won’t tell
    hmm well it looks like you got one boy this one feels really heavy whoa I got four and one
    what’s that creepy looking one I think it’s a tuna maybe even a three dot oh
    the best thing about catching so many fish is that now you can use one of them
    to catch even bigger fish I don’t know the money seems to be working pretty
    good on its own and that attitude is precisely why you’ve never won an indoor
    fishing derby so how big do these indoor fish get pretty big they’ve had a
    cushion your life and their outdoor counterparts I’m a little nervous about
    the idea of all these fish that have just been roaming our house the entire
    time and I wouldn’t worry about it they mostly stick to themselves whew I
    got a nibble whoa look at that rod tip this one must be really big whoa this is
    the biggest one yet come on Addie you can do it stop being so encouraging you’re
    confusing me oh I’m sorry uh it’ll probably get away is that
    better much better there it is that’s strange well that’s the biggest fish I’ve ever
    caught uh Addie I don’t think that’s a fish not a fish I’m a mom and do hear
    that Jillian we caught a mom made uh I think he said mom man right let me sit
    up this isn’t very comfortable I’m sorry I caught you mr. mom man Oh think nothing of it can I keep this tasty fish in this money though yeah
    please just go back to where you came from not so fast Jane I think mom mades
    are supposed to grant wishes yeah normally you would be right but
    um I’m not a mom made I’m a mirror man so what do we get for catching a mom man
    well for a mom man I’ll grant you three advices three advices I’d rather have
    wishes or I could just give you nothing at all and leave now we’ll take the
    advice I could use some financial advice oh well that’s easy just buy low and
    sell high that’s all you really need to do well everyone knows that that’s not
    really advice that’s just common sense you have two advices left and then I go
    you can ask him Jillian I already know everything any advice for getting along
    with your siblings well you got it pretty easy I mean after all I was just
    one of 20,000 more eggs you only have just the one sister so I don’t see what
    the big problem is that’s not really advice is it fine um be patient okay
    there you go this is the worst advice more man ever
    whoo-hoo I do have a question huh I guess you don’t know everything do you
    how do I catch an even bigger indoor fish there is tell of a legend of a
    great fish in these waters waters were fishing indoors don’t interrupt him
    you’re so great many have hooked into them but none have landed them yet okay
    that’s a nice legend but it’s still not advice
    oh great more man how do I land such a fish oh well since you called me great
    more man I use just a little bit of cheese and cast with your left hand instead of
    your right hand it’ll work really I mean come on you’re talking to a more man I
    know what I’m talking about here Thank You more man this is great advice I
    know I know so anyway I’m just going to take this
    money in this fish and uh I’ll be on my way okay whatever what a weird more man I think the fact that there was a more man here at all is what was weird
    so he said to catch the biggest fish we’re gonna need some cheese hmm oh I
    have some provolone what do you just carry provolone around in your pocket
    I’m not a barbarian I keep it in a cooler that provolone looks a little
    hard to cast you got anything more aerodynamic how about one of these mini
    cheese wheels your ability to produce random cheese is kind of scary there we
    go I put it on the line for you all right here goes nothing
    Addie remember he said to cast with your left hand huh oh yeah now I guess we just sit back and wait
    for that giant fish who I felt something nibble I really hope it isn’t that
    more man again only one way to find out I think we got the big fish Jillian this
    one’s really fighting um Addie don’t distract me joined I’m
    trying to land this fish um Addie you might want to take a look at
    what you’re fighting ah a giant shark stop reeling it in Addie I didn’t but he
    keeps coming boy that shark means business yeah when
    that more man said a big fish I was kind of hoping for a wahoo
    if the more man were here he could advise us on how to get rid of the shark if you
    want to scare away a giant fish you should use the thing that scares the
    fish most whoa was he just waiting there the whole time I guess he’s a part of
    our life now so if we want to get rid of the big fish we have to use what fish
    fear most I wonder what that could be Long John Silver I don’t think so Arthur
    Treacher I think they went out of business a while ago Red Lobster
    would you stop naming fish restaurants that’s not what he meant well if I was a
    fish I’d be afraid of them I think he met their natural predators but that’s
    usually just bigger fish well you think it over I have to go for you to our cat
    Paco his favorite dish tuna Julian that’s it you want me to throw a can of
    tuna at the shark no cats eat fish that’s what’ll scare the big fish away
    well I think Paco’s out sleeping on the Sun porch hmm I wonder if this cat
    puppet will do the trick that’s not gonna scare a shark Addie yeah I guess it
    is too cute what else do we got I don’t know Addie I’m out of ideas
    Jillian that cat mask it’s perfect huh oh yeah I guess it would be I got one too
    let’s go make some sharks do there he is get him well I don’t think he’s coming back
    good because I want to get back to fishing again really yeah and this time
    I’m going cat fishing Oh No so that’s how we caught a shark this
    story’s 100% true so why not give it a thumbs up be sure to join us every
    Sunday on babyteeth4 for new videos as well and don’t forget the Jillian
    and Addie channel every Saturday it’s just like hanging out with Jillian
    and Addie be sure to follow babyteeth4 on Instagram for new pictures videos and
    stories every day thanks for watching

    Mallrats (1/9) Movie CLIP – A Three Dimensional Sailboat (1995) HD
    Articles, Blog

    Mallrats (1/9) Movie CLIP – A Three Dimensional Sailboat (1995) HD

    November 10, 2019


    l love the smell
    of commerce in the morning! l love the smell
    of commerce in the morning! – Wow, you’re really making that last.
    – Waste not, want not. – Wow, you’re really making that last.
    – Waste not, want not. – You wanna say something?
    – Yeah, about a million things. – You wanna say something?
    – Yeah, about a million things. But l can’t express myself
    monosyllabically enough for you
    to understand ’em all. But l can’t express myself
    monosyllabically enough for you
    to understand ’em all. – Asshole.
    – Prick! – Asshole.
    – Prick! – Fuck you.
    – What was that all about? – Fuck you.
    – What was that all about? He’s the jerk from Fashionable
    Male, this upscale, wanna-be
    shop on the second floor. He’s the jerk from Fashionable
    Male, this upscale, wanna-be
    shop on the second floor. He’s the manager. The guy’s always
    giving me shit. l have no idea why. He’s the manager. The guy’s always
    giving me shit. l have no idea why. – Thought everybody
    loved you at this mall.
    – ”F” him. – Thought everybody
    loved you at this mall.
    – ”F” him. – Where do you wanna go first?
    – Back to Brandi’s. – Where do you wanna go first?
    – Back to Brandi’s. Brandi is the past, my friend.
    She’s behind you now. Brandi is the past, my friend.
    She’s behind you now. You face forward, or you face
    the possibility of shock and damage. You face forward, or you face
    the possibility of shock and damage. – You should learn
    to heed your own advice.
    – Where did that come from? – You should learn
    to heed your own advice.
    – Where did that come from? – What’s going on here?
    – Looks like a stage is being erected. – What’s going on here?
    – Looks like a stage is being erected. – What is this monstrosity?
    – Maybe it’s for the
    Easter Bunny pictures. – What is this monstrosity?
    – Maybe it’s for the
    Easter Bunny pictures. lmpossible! The Easter Bunny corner
    is down at the other end of the mall. lmpossible! The Easter Bunny corner
    is down at the other end of the mall. lt’s been up since two days
    after Christmas. l want answers! lt’s been up since two days
    after Christmas. l want answers! – Ask one of the workers.
    – No. There’s a soul
    who might know what’s up. – Ask one of the workers.
    – No. There’s a soul
    who might know what’s up. Willam? – Willam!
    – [ Gasps ] Booby-trapped! Brodie, man, what’s goin’ on?
    You work here now? – No, man, just hanging with T.S.
    – Oh, T.S. -[ T.S. ] Willam,
    what exactly are you doing?
    -Looking for the hidden picture. lf you stare long enough,
    you’re supposed to see some hidden… three-dimensional
    picture. – Oh, yeah, look, it’s a sailboat.
    – You saw it too? Damn it! – What?
    – l’ve been staring at
    this thing for a week now… – and l can’t see a goddamn thing!
    – You gotta relax your eyes. Everyone sees this thing
    except me. Today’s my day.
    l brought a lunch and a soda. l’m not gonna leave until l see this
    sailboat everyone keeps talking about. So, Willam, would you
    happen to know… what this stage business
    is all about? lt’s not a stage! l’m gonna see it
    if l have to go blind trying. No, man, this stage
    over here. Oh, that thing. Some game show in the
    mall today. l think it’s gonna be on TV. lt’s called Truth or Date
    or something. – Oh, my God! That’s
    Brandi’s father’s game show.
    – What is it? lt’s this cheesy Dating Game
    rip-off thing. lt’s supposed
    to be for college kids. Trying to capture the 90s youth market
    with a staple of 70s television. Why can’t they bring back or remake
    good shows like B.J. And The Bear? Now, there’s a concept l can’t get
    enough of; a man and his monkey. Would you guys shut up?
    You’re breaking my concentration. – Sorry, Willam.
    – Now l have to start all over again. – Good luck with that thing.
    – Yeah, man, remember, relax your eyes. – Wow, a sailboat.
    – Shut up!

    Bill Murray, Jimmy Kimmel & Guillermo’s Dirty Canoe Ride in Brooklyn
    Articles, Blog

    Bill Murray, Jimmy Kimmel & Guillermo’s Dirty Canoe Ride in Brooklyn

    November 8, 2019


    GUILLERMO AND I HAD AN ADVENTURE COURTESY OF THE NORTH BROOKLYN BOAT CLUB. WE TOOK A CANOE INTO THE NEW TOWN CREEK WHICH RUNS BETWEEN BROOKLYN AND QUEENS. AND TO MAKE IT EVEN MORE INTERESTING, WE INVITED A FRIEND, SOMEONE WHO LOVES NEW YORK AND IS AN EXPERT ON THE LIFE AQUATIC, TOO. OH, HEY, IS THIS THE PLACE?>>YEAH, THIS IS THE PLACE.>>THIS IS NICE. BEAUTIFUL.>>THIS IS MY SUMMER PLACE.>>Jimmy: SHALL WE CHECK IT OUT?>>DID YOU STRAP YOUR GUTS ON?>>I’M READY, MR. BILL.>>YOU’RE GOING TO NEED ONE OF THESE.>>ALL RIGHT. ♪ >>Jimmy: HI, GUYS. HOW ARE YOU?>>HI.>>WELCOME TO GREEN POINT.>>Jimmy: WHAT’S HAPPENING OVER HERE?>>THIS IS RECYCLING IN ACTION. IT’S COMING OUT.>>Jimmy: I KNEW THERE WOULD BE NATURAL BEAUTY, I DIDN’T KNOW THERE WOULD BE SO MUCH ARTIFICIAL BEAUTY AS WELL. THAT’S THE CYCLE OF LIFE WHEN THE RECYCLING BIN GETS RECYCLED.>>WHAT’S THE NAME OF THIS WATERWAY?>>THIS IS THE NEW TOWN CREEK. IT FORMS THE BOARD BETWEEN BROOKLYN AND QUEENS SO THAT’S — >>STAY OUT OF BROOKLYN!>>HOW YOU DOIN’ BACK THERE?>>ALL RIGHT, SO-SO.>>Jimmy: SO-SO. ♪ >>THAT IS QUEENS ON YOUR LEFT, BROOKLYN ON THE RIGHT.>>HEY, CAN YOU GIVE US A PUSH?>>YOU HAVE TO PUSH YOURSELF!>>Jimmy: WE’RE PICKIN’ UP SPEED.>>OH, SCREW THE BOAT WITH THE MOTOR. LIKE REALLY, WE CARE? HE’S GOT A FLAG. HE’S GOT A HORN. HE’S PROBABLY GOT SOME BLOW, HE’S FINE.>>YOU GUYS ARE DOING A GREAT JOB.>>THE CREEK HAS ALWAYS SERVED AS A KIND OF LIKE AN ALLEY, A SERVICE CORRIDOR FOR THE CITY.>>Jimmy: THIS IS WHERE YOU WOULD DO LIKE A CRAIGSLIST MURDER, YOU KNOW?>>NOW EVERYBODY PADDLE!>>YOU CAN SEE THESE GASOLINE TANKS ON THE RIGHT.>>Jimmy: YEAH.>>NEW TOWN CREEK HAS ALWAYS BEEN A CENTER OF OIL PRODUCTION.>>ON THE LEFT, ALL THIS STUFF HERE IS FOR THE BUCKEYE PIPELINE, A MAJOR NATIONAL PIPELINE. IT GOES TO LAGUARDIA AIRPORT, THERE’S JET FUEL GOING UNDERNEATH THE CREEK HERE.>>Jimmy: THAT’S GOOD FOR THE FISH, RIGHT?>>OH, IT’S EXCELLENT. THOSE ARE THE DIGESTER EGGS OF THE STATE-OF-THE-ART WATER TREATMENT FACILITY.>>IT CAN BE AS LITTLE AS A TENTH OF AN INCH.>>Jimmy: A TENETTH OF AN INCH?>>I KNOW PEOPLE WHO SWEAT THAT MUCH.>>IF NEW YORKERS WANT TO HELP THEY CAN AVOID FLUSHING THEIR TOILETS WHEN IT’S RAINING.>>Jimmy: I WOULD LOVE TO BE THE FACE OF THAT CAMPAIGN.>>WE WOULD LOVE IT.>>Jimmy: HEY, FOLKS, IT’S JIMMY KIMMEL, REMINDING YOU, WHEN IT STARTS TO SPRINKLE, DON’T FLUSH YOUR TINKLE. OH, NO!>>DO YOU HAVE SOME SNACKS?>>Jimmy: I SEE SOME SNACKS FLOATING BY.>>ALL THIS GARBAGE MAKING ME HUNGRY.>>Jimmy: I CAN SEE WHY YOU’D GET HUNGRY.>>WE’RE GOING TO CROSS THE CREEK TO THE QUEENS SIDE.>>Jimmy: BEAR LEFT AND CROSS THE CREEK TO THE QUEENS SIDE, EVERYBODY. PASS IT FORWARD.>>YES, PADDLE. PADDLE.>>Jimmy: I FEEL LIKE WE’VE NOW ENTERED LIKE THE NICE NEIGHBORHOOD.>>WAIT UNTIL YOU GET A LITTLE FARTHER AHEAD. THERE’S ROSE BUSHES.>>AND DEFINITELY MIMOSA TREES.>>WE CAN GET A DRINK? I’M GETTING THIRSTY. LOOK WHAT I HAVE HERE.>>Jimmy: OH, THAT’S NOT WATER, IS IT?>>IS THIS SOMETHING I CAN KEEP MY MOUTH FROM GETTING DRY?>>Jimmy: THAT TEQUILA?>>THAT’S TEQUILA. I ALWAYS HAVE TEQUILA IN CASE I GET THIRSTY.>>Jimmy: THAT’S A GOOD AMIMOSA.>>I’M NOT SURE I TASTED IT CORRECTLY.>>OH, IT’S ALL YOURS.>>Jimmy: EVERY TIME WE SEE SOMETHING ESPECIALLY FILTHY, WE’LL HAVE A TOAST.>>HMM.>>Jimmy: GRACIAS, GUILLERMO, IT TASTES A LITTLE LIKE YOUR MUSTACHE.>>HMM, YOU ARE THE FIRST ONE TO SAY THAT. THIS IS SCARY.>>Jimmy: YOU KNOW, THERE ARE TWO KINDS OF PEOPLE IN LIFE, GUILLERMO. THERE ARE PADDLERS, AND THERE ARE PASSENGERS.>>YEAH.>>Jimmy: GUESS WHICH ONE ARE YOU RIGHT NOW.>>THE PASSENGER. PADDLING IS HARD, JIMMY.>>Jimmy: YOU GUYS SPEND A LOT OF TIME OUT ON THIS WATER, HUH?>>WE BRING WEEKLY BIRD WATCHING TROOPS BACK HERE.>>YOU GUYS SINGLE?>>NO, NO, WE BOTH HAVE WIVES.>>THAT’S A SURPRISE.>>SO YOU CAN SEE A SHORE BIRD UP THERE. THAT THAT’S AN EGRET.>>Jimmy: CAN WE FEED THE EGRET?>>YOU CAN TRY, BUT THEY EAT FISH AND KCRUSTATIONS.>>DO YOU THINK THE BREAD IS NOT THAT GOOD?>>MAYBE THEY’RE ALLERGIC TO GLUTEN FREE.>>Jimmy: MAYBE THE BIRDS ARE GLUTEN FREE, THAT’S A GOOD POINT.>>I ONLY MAKE GOOD POINTS, JIMMY.>>Jimmy: THAT SEEMS LIKE A BAD SIGN.>>WHAT?>>Jimmy: PUBLGBUBBLING IS COMI FROM THE EARTH?>>THERE IS A PIPE.>>Jimmy: THIS IS WHAT YOU DO IN AN AQUARIUM BASICALLY. >>YEAH, THE SEDIMENTS ARE POLLUTED.>>Jimmy: AND WE’RE BREATHING IT IN. YOU SAY I NEVER TAKE YOU ANYWHERE FUN.>>AYE AYE AYE.>>IS THERE ANY WAY YOU CAN TAKE A PICTURE OF THAT AND PUT NICE MUSIC OVER THAT? WHITE BIRD, BY “IT’S A BEAUTIFUL ♪ ♪ ♪ ON A WINTER’S DAY ♪ IN THE RAIN ♪ >>MIMOSA!>>Jimmy: NOW WE’RE IN THE EAST RIVER.>>YES.>>Jimmy: NOW THE SITUATION’S A LITTLE BIT DODGY. IT IS BEAUTIFUL.>>THERE WE WERE, A MINUTE AGO WE WERE PADDLING AMONGST THE RECYCLING AND THE SEEPAGE.>>Jimmy: AND NOW HERE WE ARE.>>NOW WE’RE OUT HERE TO THE CITY THAT NEVER SLEEPS. [ LAUGHTER ]>>Jimmy: WHAT’S SO FUNNY?>>WHEN HE GETS NERVOUS, HE STARTS LAUGHING. HE SAYS WAIT A MINUTE. HEY, DON’T EVEN KID ABOUT THAT. SEEMED LIKE IT WAS GOING TO BE THE MOST DISGUSTING PLACE OF THE CITY, AND IT TURNED OUT TO BE KIND OF LOVELY. >>IF YOU DIVE INTO THE UGLY, EVENTUALLY, IT GETS PRETTY.>>Jimmy: THAT’S WHAT I USED TO TELL THE GIRLS IN HIGH SCHOOL. AND IT NEVER WORKED. IT NEVER WORKED. THANK YOU FOR COMING ON THIS TRIP WITH US.>>THANK YOU SO MUCH. AND THANK YOU FOR THIS, I GUESS. THANKS SO MUCH.>>Jimmy: THANK YOU FOR THE TEQUILA, GUILLERMO. AND THANKS TO YOU GUYS FOR WORKING TO CLEAR THIS AREA UP.>>CHEERS. THANKS FOR COMING OUT.>>Jimmy: TO THE EAST RIVER.>>TO THE EAST RIVER.>>Jimmy: ALL RIGHT, LET’S GET OFF THIS WATER. I’M GOING TO THROW UP.

    EATING FISH SEMEN (Shirako) (Adults vs Food)
    Articles, Blog

    EATING FISH SEMEN (Shirako) (Adults vs Food)

    November 8, 2019


    ♪ (French accordion music) ♪ – (FBE) Today, you’ll be eating this. – Ooh, okay. Exciting. What in the Nine Hells is that? – Oh! It looks like an intestine. – It looks almost like
    a brain type of situation. That’s exciting. – Maybe intestines,
    but I think it looks like brains. – This is like something that I feel
    like I’ve seen in my biology class. – Can I touch it? Eugh! – Ooh, is that moving?! Yo, I thought it moved for a second. – (murmuring) Why did I do that?! There’s a first time for everything and, unfortunately,
    my first time is today. – (FBE) And now you get to taste it.
    – Ooh! Fancy. – Ooh, this is fancy. It’s sushi now. – All right, YOLO. Oh… hold up. Ooh, that aftertaste– that aftertaste. It’s just like mush of nastiness. – All right, here we go. It’s weird because
    it tastes like it smells. – (mumbling) It’s not bad. I kind of want to finish it now. It’s like when you eat a hard boiled egg. It tastes kind of like the cooked yolk. – It does have a very fishy taste,
    but it’s actually not bad. It’s really good. – Ew. Ew, I hate the texture. It’s sort of slimy, a little,
    like a little slimy, but mostly just rubbery. – I’m going to go all in
    and then… we’ll see. It’s… kind of grainy. Does that make sense? But not, like, sandpapery. It looks meh and it tastes meh. – Hmmm, it’s okay. It’s definitely salty. I probably won’t eat a whole meal of it, but, I mean, just taking
    a few bites of it was fine. – Hmmm. Whatever it is, I’d eat it again. Once you eat it, it’s almost
    like a pâté kind of situation. – You do not want to smell
    my breath right now. – (FBE) You just ate shirako.
    – Shirako. Never heard of it. – (FBE) Shirako is cod milt,
    so to put it in more familiar terms, it’s fish semen.
    – (gasping) Oh my god!!! No way! Yo! Yo! ‘Ey. ‘Ey. Come on.
    Come on now. – Oh… (queasily) oh. – Well… – That’s not bad! (laughing) I’d eat it twice. – (groaning) Oh my god! My mom is going to watch this!
    (embarrassed laughter) – (FBE) In Japanese cuisine,
    the milt of cod, anglerfish, salmon, squid and pufferfish
    are all considered a delicacy. – I mean, it doesn’t taste bad. It is a very mild flavor. – It was actually pretty good, so I could see how it’s a delicacy. – I can’t argue with
    their culture. (chuckling) If that’s what they like,
    that’s what they like. – Thumbs up for you guys,
    but I don’t know, man. This one might not be the one for me. – (FBE) So for the poll, do you recommend
    that people eat shirako? – Absolutely. – Yeah, I mean, why not? – You only live once. Try everything at least twice. – No. No. Nay. Nada. Nay. No bueno. – Yes! It’s good to step outside
    your culinary comfort zone. – I wouldn’t recommend it. I just ate fish semen!
    Are you serious? – It actually doesn’t taste bad. Give it a shot. Is there… is there anymore? – I say go for it. Don’t let them tell
    you what is until after you eat it, but definitely try it. (laughing) – Thank you for watching
    Adults Versus Food on the React channel. – Thumbs up for fish semen. – What food should we eat next? Let us know in the comments. – Hey, guys, I’m Katie,
    a React channel producer. Thank you so much for watching. Now if you could just come on over
    and hit that subscribe button.

    ESCAPING GAME MASTER PRISON CHALLENGE! 3D PRINTER SPY GADGET BOX FORT PRISON ESCAPE! (Project Zorgo)
    Articles, Blog

    ESCAPING GAME MASTER PRISON CHALLENGE! 3D PRINTER SPY GADGET BOX FORT PRISON ESCAPE! (Project Zorgo)

    November 8, 2019


    previously on Papa Jake I just press it doors opening
    I can’t get a big red boy no all right well puts if you only remember getting
    out of here is with some sort of crystal fall good thing I’m slightly trained in
    acrobatics let’s stick this out sounds like success all right we made it to the
    next room whoa okay it’s a bit of a smaller room oh but it looks like this
    is in the last room though I’m not seeing a crystal ball anywhere
    which means this maze keeps going on yeah okay I’ll have the video done in 30
    minutes all right guys I need to update you on what’s going on currently the
    game master has me upstairs editing Jake’s footage I think he’s trapped in
    some kind of box for maze right now but essentially the game master has taken
    over our channel I’m only able to talk to you guys when I sneak Clips like this
    into the videos hopefully Jake can figure out a way to break out soon but
    as of now there’s not much I can do guys the game master can disable
    subscriptions so you have to make sure to hit the bell button it might be the
    only way you can see our videos my guess is the ground fight anything
    there’s a triangle here this might be the door it’s locked oh looks like
    there’s a walk across it okay all right well it looks like we found the way out
    of here I don’t think that has anything to do with this though I mean if the
    gamemaster has all of these rooms being some sort of puzzle or game this room
    has to be a puzzle or a game I’m not seeing anything like that wait what could he want me to do with this
    okay well I mean you already had me popping balloons maybe maybe I have to
    hit something with this I could hit the triangle all right let’s see what
    happens if I hit the triangle flashlight on this okay that helps see if this does
    anything nope doesn’t look like that did anything
    at all alright well if it’s not that it’s gotta
    be something in here something I’ve got a hit with this something something I
    need to activate using this nerf blaster guys there’s got to be some sort of clue
    in here to tell me what to do with this nerf blaster it’s gotta find it wait
    with the pen lid I still the UV light on it
    I saved this from the prison ok maybe there’s a clue in here written in UV ink wait wait there’s some righty l-o-l this
    isn’t funny the keymaster think he’s funny putting jokes in here something
    something wait the triangle the track guys guys I got something there’s an
    arrow there’s an arrow point towards the triangle another arrow wait wait here
    punch punch I think I have to punch it I have to punch the triangle whatever I
    have to do with this nerf blaster has to be on the other side of this triangle
    all right well I’m gonna do what the thing says and punch it here goes nothin
    in three two one oh all right it worked and it looks like
    there’s another room on the other side okay
    well unless I’m crawling through a very small hole then I need to do something
    to open the store using this nerf blaster okay guys so looking in this
    room there’s not much information but at the other end there it looks like there
    might be some sort of target I’ve got nothing else to lose I might as well try
    shooting it with this and see if it does something to activate the door lock three-two-one okay that was completely
    off and I only have two shots left let’s try that again all right this time I’m
    gonna try bring the blaster through the hole and holding it like this here we go just missed getting closer let’s try
    that again okay here we go last shot in three two one
    nice guys I got it look Oh guys guess the logs moving perfect that looks like
    it works guys the law completely retracted which means we can go into the
    other room all right here we go sweet all right well looks like so far
    the game master hasn’t been able to stump us maybe the crystal balls in this
    room whoa okay well crystal ball is definitely not in
    this room but I found ourselves a bigger room and there is the triangle that
    we’re shooting from okay so we gotta find our next spot now it’s time for me
    to give you the most valuable item you all ever have something something to
    help you escaped from my mace you supply sleep the most the most important item
    I’ve ever used what what do you what do you mean what what is it what what do
    you what woody why are you giving me a gift
    look this is another trick I’m not falling for it guys The Game Master
    wants to give me some sort of gift to help me escape from this thing either
    he’s tricking me or this is all part of him seeing me complete some sort of game
    guys I don’t know about this I don’t know about you but I’m not exactly sure
    what that is all right well we still have to complete this maze and if we’re
    gonna get that crystal ball the only thing we can do right now is trust the
    game master and follow him all right let’s see what’s at the end of this
    hallway guys I don’t know what that is kind of
    scared to pick it up and look it looks like there’s some sort of hole here all
    right well let’s who this is guys do you have any idea what this is what you see
    in front of you is a portable 3d printer use it to escape my base a portable 3d
    printer what what am I gonna do with this guys I have no idea how I’m
    supposed to use a portable 3d printer to escape this maze I don’t even know how
    this thing works what I’m supposed to do with it print
    print a way out of here print like a key to open me to open the door wait wait
    wait yes that’s that’s a keyhole and I think this might be the next door let’s
    try it mm nope
    buzzer went off all right you know what maybe this is something I can use to
    print a key look if you look here it looks like there’s a very specific
    keyhole in here I’m not able to really get in with my finger anything but maybe
    I could make something with this to get inside okay let’s bring this back here
    and figure it out all right so it looks like it is some sort of 3d printer it
    looks like this is I guess like ammo for it and I guess we just get guys guys
    it’s working it’s pretty it’s pretty okay I got some
    plastic it’s hot all right well it looks like this is in fact some sort of
    portable 3d printer guys this could be a huge asset but why would the gamemaster
    give this to me I mean I know he wants me to solve his puzzles I know he wants
    me to solve his game but giving me an asset like this I could make things to
    avoid his traps all right we got to use this and utilize it as best as we can
    first thing starts with that keyhole all right looks like it should be a pretty
    generic keyhole if I can make something that resembles a key I should be able to
    use it to get in there and get into the next room I don’t know about you guys
    but I think we’re getting close and Logan if you’re watching this I hope the
    viewers know I’m doing this for them I’m getting out of here for them the only
    reason I’m playing the game masters games is because he promised me some
    clues he promised he tell me who he is Logan I’m not able to see the comments
    or know what’s going on but maybe some of the viewers were able to crack the
    code from the last episode maybe some of you guys know what the game master is up
    to all right well let’s get to printing this key should be too hard let’s just
    start making a generic key all right and there we go guys now all
    they have to do is wait for the 3d print to set and I think we should have a key
    and be able to get into the next room I really wish I had one of these before my
    prison escapes this could have come in handy and guys let me know in the
    comments if you have any ideas on how I can use this to escape from here I mean
    I don’t know how much materials I have for this but if I can print anything I
    want we can definitely use it to take down the gamemaster
    looks like he’s ready and yeah it’s a solid key guys check that out this thing
    is rock hard all right let’s see if we can use this to open that okay here goes
    nothing in three two one looks like a one in hand let’s turn it
    Oh perfect looks like the doors activated alright time to go into the
    next room guys here we go game master yeah I think you forgot to turn the
    lights on and in the next the next room that there’s no lights on in there okay
    you guys I I can’t see what’s going on in there at all and knowing the game
    master and knowing that he has creepers I don’t exactly want to go in there
    maybe you guys can go first